Friday, August 26, 2005
Tailored for the readership of Teen People magazine and about as thought-provoking as the average 500-word celebrity profile, "Undiscovered" follows the romantic and career-based ups and downs of a group of pretty, yet pretty vacant Los Angeles model-musician-actor hyphenates.
When cute-as-a-bunny model-turned-actress Brier (Pell James) meets singer-songwriter Luke (Steven Strait), a hunk poised on the verge of becoming a pop-music heartthrob, she's involved in a doomed relationship with a caddish rock star (Stephen Moyer). So while Brier and Luke's relationship languishes in the "friend zone," the only tension the film is able to muster comes not from the question of whether, but when, these two crazy kids will wake up and realize they're meant for each other. I have news for you: This particular epiphany comes, right on schedule, about 90 minutes after the lights go out. And I don't think I'm spoiling anything for anybody except those who have never been to a romantic movie in their lives.
Meanwhile, Luke's career takes off, then does a nose dive, represented by the infamous Downward Spiral Montage of heavy drinking and repossessed cars. Somewhere in there, Luke realizes that Brier played a part in his discovery, leading to Luke's anger at not being able to -- cliche alert -- make it on his own terms. But rest easy, my children. All will be well, and Ashlee Simpson, who plays Brier's best friend, Clea, will get to sing -- or at least lip-sync -- several more songs than she managed on "Saturday Night Live."
Undiscovered (PG-13, 92 minutes) -- Contains some obscenity, a drug reference, post-coital canoodling, a catfight and scantily clad booty-shaking. Area theaters.