Giving Inspired by Grief

All of the proceeds from events go directly to researchers, Guandolo said. He said he hopes to eventually raise tens of millions of dollars each year for MS research.

For Steve and Ellen Tomczyk of Springfield, their charity, Cole's Closet, has been a source of comfort since their 6-month-old son Cole died in 1999. Doctors were never able to diagnose the ailment that killed him.

Cole's Closet operates "toy closets" in four local hospitals that provide new toys to hospitalized children and their siblings.

The program got started almost by accident, said Ellen Tomczyk, when the family held a get-together a year after Cole's death and asked guests to bring a toy to donate to Inova Fairfax Hospital. To their surprise, they collected some 400 items.

"I think the Lord was pointing us in a direction," Tomczyk said.

They opened their first closet at Inova Fairfax Hospital for Children in 2000 and have since opened others at Inova Fair Oaks Hospital, Virginia Hospital Center in Arlington and Shady Grove Adventist Hospital in Rockville. To date, they have donated about 12,000 toys -- including CD players and PlayStation video game systems for pediatric wards -- by raising money through fundraisers such as yard sales, silent auctions and dinners.

But Cole's Closet has grown far beyond playthings. It has also pledged $10,000 toward the renovation of Inova Fairfax Hospital for Children and has launched an outreach program for the families of children hospitalized for long stretches, providing them with such items as phone cards, Starbucks and gasoline gift cards, and greeting cards bearing messages of support from the Tomczyks.

The organization has been a "huge healing path for us," said Ellen Tomczyk, a homemaker. "People say what a wonderful thing we're doing, and we say, 'No, you don't know what a help this is to us.' "

Brian Cole, Ashley Cole's husband, also said his work on the foundation has been a source of comfort.

Ashley was diagnosed with melanoma in March 1999, when she was 25, shortly after she met Brian.

Melanoma, an especially deadly form of skin cancer, hits young adults particularly hard and is the primary cause of cancer deaths among women ages 25 to 30.

The prognosis for Ashley was hopeful. She underwent surgery, including removal of her lymph nodes, and a year of drug treatment with interferon.