A New Night Life Dawns in the Suburbs

Some gays in the suburbs said that without many welcoming places to patronize and without the kind of support system that exists in the District, the political and social climate makes it difficult for some to come out about their sexual orientation. Joey, 49, of Centreville said he came out eight years ago and feels comfortable being a regular at gay bowling groups, at happy hours sponsored by Dulles Triangles, and at Jake's, where he said he goes "for friendship first and foremost, and with the possibility of a long-term relationship."

"The biggest thing is, you can let your hair down a little bit. So many of us work in environments where you can't be out," said Joey, who spoke on the condition that only his first name be used because he works at Fairfax County public schools.

The largely hidden nature of gay life outside the District did not stop two Britons from creating an outlet for social activities outside Frederick. Chris Baker and his partner, Michael Hydes, moved to Hagerstown by way of New York and found the gay community there to be relatively invisible. One nearby gay bar, Deer Park, drew patrons from miles away, but that was it. Six months ago, Baker and some friends started Community Triangle of Washington County, a gay social and advocacy organization that hosts monthly dinners at restaurants -- but only if those establishments show support by carrying the group's rainbow-colored fliers.

"There was a need for something," said Baker, 37. "The aim is to be visible and to demonstrate our purchasing power as a community within a community."

Far outside the District, Fredericksburg hosted its third annual gay pride festival in late August, an event that has grown from a small boat cruise into a three-day affair with rock-and-roll performances and late-night happenings at bars.

"What was missing was just awareness in the community that Fredericksburg does have a large gay population. Not all are out, but quite a lot are," said DeWayne Lawrence, 43, president of Fredericksburg Pride, a nonprofit community service organization.

What draws people to Jake's Restaurant, patrons have said, is its hometown feel and safe environment. They said it offers a place for gays to meet without the hassle of a long drive. Some prefer Jake's because they find hyper-trendy D.C. clubs off-putting. "Here, people come up to you and talk, and they become friends," said Tom Donovian, 60, of Culpeper. "You don't find that in D.C. They're mostly S&M bars -- stand and model. They just want to stand around and look pretty."

A few patrons, though grateful for the gay night, would like the restaurant to be more open and get rid of the "private party" sign. If Jake's advertised, they have said, more people would come.

"It'd be nice if they would be more supportive. They're making enough money, I think, on a Monday night that they should be fine with advertising in the gay established press," said Marcus Kurghan, 25, of Centreville. "What other bar has this much business on a Monday night in Manassas?"