Little Green Lies

Would you ever lie to your spouse about your spending?

Have you ever run up a large credit card bill and kept it hidden from your honey? Right now, are there new clothes stashed in the trunk of your car or in the back of a closet? Do you have an iPod your wife doesn't know you bought?

According to two surveys, financial infidelity is a problem in many relationships.

Nearly one-third (29 percent) of adults ages 25 to 55 who said they were in a committed relationship (either married, engaged or living with a partner) said they had been dishonest about their spending habits, according to a survey sponsored by Redbook magazine and Lawyers.com, a free online directory of lawyers.

The investment management company OppenheimerFunds came up with similar results in its recently released 2005 Women & Investing Survey. The company found that for both men (24 percent) and women (26 percent), cash was named as the No. 1 item that they are most likely to hide from their spouse.

And which purchases are people most likely to hide? Entertainment (20 percent) and electronics (16 percent) topped the list for men, while women named clothing (23 percent) and food (19 percent).

It's the next finding from the OppenheimerFunds survey that I think contributes to this deception.

Slightly more women (40 percent) than men (36.8 percent) have a checking, savings or brokerage account to which their spouse does not have access.

"Because so many couples now maintain separate banking and credit card accounts, the risk of deceit is even greater," said Alan Kopit, an attorney and adviser to Lawyers.com. "The fact that you have individual accounts is not open license to do whatever you want if you want to remain financially healthy."

In the Redbook/Lawyers.com survey, which will appear in the November issue of the magazine, women were more likely to keep information from their partners. It seems it is easier to hide extra purchases or overdue credit card bills if you're in charge of the household budget. Forty-one percent of women were found to be responsible for the household accounts, compared with 21 percent of men.

Kopit said the financial deception that couples practice is the outcome of a larger problem -- a lack of communication and shared financial goals.

"Couples have to communicate," he said. "They need to come up with some common financial goals . . . and figure out how to reach those goals."