A Timely Guide To 'King Kong' For the Fidgety

Saturday, December 17, 2005

At 3 hours 7 minutes, "King Kong" is a challenge for those short of attention span, small of bladder and with knees that seize up after a long sit. To make this holiday chest-pounder more pleasant, we offer these quick intermission options for your consideration:

Minute 1*: Show up late and you'll really only miss the Depression montage (soup kitchens, thin coats, brrr, hungry, etc.).

Minute 20: Enter Adrien Brody. (Not a fan? Nacho time.)

Minute 40: Skedaddle after the Naomi Watts-Brody smooch and you've got a 14-minute break before the appearance of creepity "Skull Island."

Minute 115: The epic beast beat-down (dinos, centipedes, gross pink fleshy roundworms with fangs) -- it'll still be going when you return.

Minute 137: Kong is subdued. Sadness. Make medicinal Milk Dud run while the boat returns to NYC.

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