Fore on the Floor at Avenel

What did Washington do to deserve being kicked in the groin by the PGA Tour, and having our tournament date moved to the gulag of the fall -- when nobody we've ever heard of will play? (And how about when the Tour announced it -- 5 o'clock Friday afternoon, the day before a Redskins playoff game, guaranteeing it would be played small? It reminded me of LaSooz's signature move, announcing a big hike in Boulez ticket prices on the afternoon of the NCAA final! God, I love her.)

For nearly 20 years Washington showed up in droves at Avenel, loyally supporting weak, crapahoola fields (like, hello, Tiger never came!) that yielded no-name, first-time Tour winners, and this is our reward? The capital of the United States is no longer good enough to hold a summer golf event? Really?

Now we'll come after everything. We're so late in the season, they'll have already played all four majors, the tour championship -- and the Outback Bowl! Akron has a better date than us. Hartford has a better date than us.

Who's going to play here now? Three lucky winners off the Hooters Tour and Morris Hatalsky's younger brother? This tournament is so late even the indefatigable Vijay will be golfed out by then. Get ready for the Brett Quigley Open. (If only Jack Abramoff wasn't out of commission. He could have fixed this. Wouldn't you love to see Abramoff play the Pro-Am in that trench coat and black fedora?)

This stinks. How did it happen? Did the PGA finally get sick of Booz Allen's incessant whining that Avenel was a dog track, and how they weren't sure they would maintain their sponsorship if the site wasn't better? (How large do you think that went over with the PGA, considering the PGA built Avenel?) But the story said we shouldn't worry because the Tour would "offer incentives" to players to come here. Like what, Boulez tickets?