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A Take-Home Test

Thursday, February 16, 2006 9:57 PM

Think your kids have too much homework? If so, you're in the minority, according to a poll by the Associated Press and AOL Learning Services. Fifty-seven percent of parents think the amount of homework their kids have is just right.

Women spend an average 46 minutes a day helping with homework. Men spend 35 minutes. Think that's good enough, parents? Not according to teachers. Ninety percent of teachers think parents should spend more time? with their kids doing homework.

Are teachers right? How much time do you spend with your kids on homework? Do you wish you had more time? Send your thoughts to parenting@washingtonpost.com. I'll post some responses in next week's newsletter.

Of course, by high school, your child is likely leaving you in the academic dust. More and more students are taking advanced classes -- one in three will take an AP class in high school.

The increase in numbers and diversity is creating new challenges for educators, as the percentage who pass the classes decreases. Some teachers meet one-on-one with students on Saturdays; others are helping with studying and organizational skills.

Although Smaller Class Sizes Are Touted, Some Say Bigger May Be Beneficial

Help Find Super High Schools

Struggling Children

Every child struggles with something in life, be it school, friendships, emotions or behavior. Most learn to meet their challenges or simply outgrow them. But how do parents know when their child's problem is serious enough to require professional help?

Author and neuropsychologist Richard F. Newby will be online today at 10 a.m. to answer questions for parents who suspect their child has a problem but don't know how to get help.

Newby is the coauthor of "Your Struggling Child: A Guide to Diagnosing, Understanding and Advocating for Your Child With Learning, Behavior or Emotional Problems," which helps parents recognize the symptoms and seek the right diagnosis for their child. Submit your questions for Newby before or during the discussion. Can't read the discussion as it happens? Come back later and read the transcript.

Toy Makers Hitch Products to IPod Craze

Group: Kids Need Extra Care in Disasters

Back-Seat Tweeners

The Automotive Coalition for Traffic Safety is alarmed at the number of kids between 8 and 12 who are riding in the front seat. A study by the nonprofit group found that about one-third of 400 children surveyed - and half of the 12-year-olds - sat up front, putting them at higher risk of injury or death in an accident. The nonprofit says 417 children between the ages of 8 and 12 died in traffic crashes in 2004, an average of more than one per day. About one-third of the 12-and-under children who were killed in crashes in 2000 were riding in the front seat, according to the Centers for Disease Control.

The CDC says kids should be 4-foot-9 before leaving a booster seat, then ride in the back through age 12. The nonprofit SafetyBeltSafe U.S.A. goes even further, recommending kids stay in back until they can drive themselves.

Where does your tweener ride? Got a 12-year-old that's bigger than you and rebels at the back seat? Send your thoughts to parenting@washingtonpost.com. I'll post some responses next week.

Smart Babies

Before they can walk and talk, babies have a grasp of numbers, according to a new study. At 7 months, babies listened to a recording of two women speaking and chose to look at a photo of two women. When they heard three voices, they picked the photo with three faces.

"We conclude that the babies are showing an internal representation of 'two-ness' or three-ness,'" says a researcher.

Antidepressants May Harm Newborns' Lungs

Cautions Issued on Use of Psychiatric Drugs

Many Preemies Do Well in Early Adulthood

What's Up With Girls?

The good news: Illegal drug and alcohol abuse among teens has fallen among teens. The bad news: Teenage girls have surpassed boys in numbers using marijuana, alcohol and cigarettes.

Females become addicted faster than males and as adults become ill with diseases like lung cancer and cirrhosis more quickly, according to a book examining the problem by the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University.

Another disturbing trend for parents to worry about: Girls are becoming more violent, against others and against themselves. James Garbarino, author of "Lost Boys," has turned his attention to this disturbing trend in his new book, "See Jane Hit." Garbarino will be online to answer questions about girls, culture and violence on Friday, March 10 at 10 a.m. ET. It's a few weeks away, but you can submit a question now for him to answer next month.

A postscript: One place where girls lag far behind boys: kids' movies. Researchers looked at 101 G-rated movies made between 1990 and 2004. For every female character, there were about three male characters.

Get a Life: Club Running

No, not that kind of club. I mean the kind where people gather regularly for the common goal of staying fit - a goal that's easier to reach when it includes socializing. Running Network lists clubs by state. Don't run? The American Volkssports Association lists walking clubs by state - or start your own.

"Clubs are a great way for parents to keep up with the sport," says Running Network President Larry Eder, who put in his time with a jogging stroller. "In a club you can find like-minded parents and the miles go a lot easier if you have someone to train with."

E-Mail Bag: Diaper Madness

Lots of parents weighed in this week on diapering infants. A surprising number have tried "elimination communication" and succeeded, even with their third or fourth child. Slightly more say no thanks, no time--they're sticking to diapers.

"This may be a great thing for parents who don't have to work," says Stephanie in Winston-Salem. "But for those of us who have to schlep to work and stress about finding a decent daycare for our kids, we can only dream about having enough time to be that attentive to our children. This is a phenomenon among rich parents only."

But Tracy in Bethesda plans to try it with her 7-month-old son, even though he's in day care. Amanda in Bristol, Conn., practices EC with her fourth child. "I actually spend less time pottying Coren than I would changing his diaper." she writes. Angela in Washington says her sitter is doing it with her baby. "It has cut down on her diaper load and my diaper budge. I am all for it if you have the time."

Time and place dictated toilet training for Anjali, who writes from Pune, India. "Since I live in a tropical country, the idea of diapers is abhorrent due to sweating involved. Also the idea of keeping one's child in her excrement (howsoever absorbent the diaper maybe) is unthinkable for Indians."

Anthea of Austin says her mother claims she potty-trained her more than 60 years ago by the age of 1 month. "I think it was the alternative--washing cloth diapers by hand and drying them in that dreadful cold and wet weather there for years--that made women do it apparently fairly happily," she says.

Dana from Asheville, N.C. considered EC, but had second thoughts. "While I might be willing to sprint down the hall to get him to the potty on time (trying desperately not to drop him, either in the hall or in the bowl) my sitter would probably balk," she writes. "And it seemed that the stress of the urgency of getting him there would cause more issues than changing a diaper at 3 a.m.

Clearly, what works for some parents doesn't work for others. Janet from La Crosse, Wis., sums up: "Anybody who does what they truly think is best for their child is doing the right thing."

E-Mail Bag: Party Envy

Some parents lavish too much time and money on their children's birthdays, writes Robert in Washington. "I remember being in someone's office where their staff was stuffing goodie bags for their child's birthday party. The party was to require rented luxury buses, to move children from one party event to another. . . At that point I realized we were Ancient Rome at its most decadent and my family was not going to be part of it. . . let people talk."

But Lisa in Bethesda hired a reptile organization for her daughter's party - and she doesn't feel bad about it. "I'm not doing it to impress the neighbors. I do it because my daughter really loves all kinds of animals."

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