Some Saw Moussaoui As Bit Player, Juror Says

But the debate grew more difficult in the trial's second phase, when prosecutors presented more than three dozen family members of Sept. 11 victims, who often sobbed as they testified about their loss.

The juror said he and his colleagues were deeply moved by them but thought they had to put aside both their emotions and their disgust for Moussaoui and "really focus on the law."

And when they did that, a number of jurors questioned whether "the death penalty is really an appropriate punishment for lying," the juror said. He said a number of jurors thought Moussaoui "wasn't fully aware of the 9/11 plot. He may have been part of a parallel operation, a second wave of attacks, but he wasn't anywhere close to flying a plane on 9/11."

The jury took 41 hours to decide on life in prison -- a deliberation period considered long even for a death-penalty case -- because the 42-page verdict form was so complicated, the juror said. He said the panel went through the form question by question and voted on each "aggravating" or "mitigating" factor individually after discussing it. "The number of questions was really quite significant,'' the juror said. "That's why we were in there for so long.''

The juror said he was one of three people on the panel who wrote a "mitigating factor" on the verdict form, saying that Moussaoui had "limited knowledge" of the Sept. 11 plot. He said nine jurors decided that Moussaoui's dysfunctional childhood was a mitigating factor in part because a number of them read a book by Moussaoui's brother, which was entered into evidence, in the jury room. But he said that was far less significant to the final decision than the questions about Moussaoui's Sept. 11 role.

As for the defense argument that executing Moussaoui would make him a martyr, the juror said the panel quickly dismissed it because defense attorneys had presented no evidence. "It was just the lawyers saying it," he said. "If the defense had brought in an al-Qaeda expert to talk about al-Qaeda's reaction or something like that, then we would've had something to evaluate."

And as to the question that has long been debated -- whether Moussaoui is mentally ill -- the juror said the panel compared the testimony of a defense psychologist who said Moussaoui suffers from paranoid delusions with that of a prosecution expert who said he is eccentric but sane. No juror found that Moussaoui's mental state was a mitigating factor, the juror said, because the prosecution expert had examined Moussaoui three times and the defendant had refused to meet with the expert his attorneys had hired. "We really just looked at the doctors,'' he said.

The juror lavishly praised Brinkema's handling of the case and lawyers for both sides. But he said that the nightmares about the case have continued and that "I never, ever want to be on jury duty for the rest of my life. I hope I get a free pass."

In the federal courtroom yesterday, Brinkema asked whether any Sept. 11 victims wanted to speak. There was a rustling in the third row, where family members have sat since the trial began two months ago.

Rosemary Dillard, whose husband, Eddie, was killed Sept. 11, walked to the podium, turned toward Moussaoui and said angrily: "I want you, Mr. Moussaoui, to know that you have wrecked my life. . . . With you, I feel nothing but disgust.'' Moussaoui stared back impassively.

Lisa Dolan, who lost her husband, U.S. Navy Capt. Bob Dolan, at the Pentagon, kept her comment succinct: "There is still one final judgment day.''

When Moussaoui took the stand for his final statement before sentencing, he glared at the family members and said: "You have an amount of hypocrisy beyond any belief. Your humanity is a very selective humanity."

Assistant U.S. Attorney Robert A. Spencer rose to object, saying Moussaoui should not be allowed to make a political speech. Brinkema agreed, but Moussaoui continued in the same vein.

"I fight for my belief, and I'm a mujahedin, and you think that you own the world . . . and I would prove you wrong," Moussaoui said. "We will come back another day."

But Brinkema had the last word.

"The rest of your life you will spend in prison," Brinkema said as Moussaoui tried to talk over her one last time. But the judge, who is a trained singer, spoke louder, drowning him out.

"You will never again get a chance to speak, and that is an appropriate and fair ending. This case is now concluded."