What Condi Whispered About Don

Scanlon, who also served as spokesman for then-House Majority Whip Tom DeLay (R-Tex.), is facing as much as five years in the slammer. He told the newspaper he finished classes at Hopkins six years ago but never got around to completing his degree requirements. The Hopkins Arts and Sciences faculty code of conduct notes that the "Hopkins community" relies on "the principles of truth and honesty."

Well, lots of inmates work on getting their GED. Maybe Scanlon will be working on his PhD?

Enough Crude Oil to Sink, Say, Bermuda

The CIA's World Factbook provides an extraordinary range of data -- from annual rainfall to birthrates to economic, social and political facts -- about every country on the planet. It is one of the must-have reference books (or computer bookmarks) for foreign policy wonks.

What with gasoline prices becoming an increasingly contentious political issue, we thought we would check which countries are gobbling up the world's oil production. The United States, of course, ranks first, with 20 million barrels of crude oil a day. The European Union -- which the agency includes as a single entity -- is second, at 14.6 million barrels, followed by China (6.4 million) and Japan (5.6 million). No surprises there.

But the fifth biggest consumer is Bermuda, the small British colony (pop. roughly 60,000) that consumes an extraordinary 4.7 million barrels of oil a day. That's more than 78 barrels a day per resident. This can't be personal consumption. What else could Bermuda need that much oil for? Wait a minute -- certain weapons of mass destruction use significant amounts of oil. Nah, not Bermuda.

Or maybe the agency was thinking 4,700 barrels and just added a few zeros? Close enough for agency work.

Will This Get Cheney in the HOV Lanes?

Some people in Washington may have calmed down about the possibility of another terrorist attack in this area. There are, after all, no recent Department of Homeland Security color-coded terrorism alerts to keep everyone on edge.

But Vice President Cheney is taking no chances. Seems Cheney, when traveling in his hideous wake-the-dead sirens-wailing motorcades shortly after 7 a.m. from his Northwest residence, has a big duffel bag in the middle of the back seat.

In the bag? A "chemical-biological suit," he told a friend, according to an article in the latest Vanity Fair.

CBS Claims Pentagon's Not All Ears

CBS News calls to insist that, contrary to an internal Pentagon review of press coverage of Rumsfeld's recent trip to Baghdad, reporter Thalia Assuras filed for evening news and filed repeatedly for CBS radio news and their Web site during that particularly non-newsworthy trip. So call the Pentagon and demand a correction.