Feeling the Spirit -- Outside the Pew

A growing canon of kids' books takes a less weighty approach to religion, says Karen-Marie Yust, a professor at Union Theological Seminary in Richmond. Some books offer kinder, gentler Bible stories. Others -- like Marjorie Barker's "Magical Hands," about the value of helping others -- convey moral or spiritual messages without heavily theistic themes. Still others, like "God's Paintbrush," by Rabbi Sandy Eisenberg Sasso, invite children to create their own concept of God.

Yust is also a fan of silence for youngsters. (And what parent isn't?) During a meditative time, she says, kids can hear "their inner voice, or the spirit of God or whatever one wants to name that." Yust, who has led workshops for parents conflicted about religion, suggests teaching kids to use a word or phrase as a conscious reminder throughout the day to connect with God or, if they prefer, a sense of calm. Other approaches appear in her book, "Real Kids, Real Faith: Practices for Nurturing Children's Spiritual Lives."

Community groups and volunteerism can provide a sense of meaning without traditional religious beliefs and practices, says University of Utah clinical neuropsychologist Sam Goldstein, co-author of "Raising Resilient Children." Among local options: taking kids to yoga, finding God in nature via the Sierra Club or other wilderness societies, and participating in a group like the Washington Ethical Society (www.ethicalsociety.org), which focuses not on a deity but on cultivating the human capacity for good.

For parents who want to talk to their kids about God but who seek less conventional images, Yust suggests speaking of "something bigger than ourselves." God, she says, "can be about this sense that the world doesn't stop where our skin ends, that there's something bigger, and it's hopeful, and it brings a certain peace and satisfaction. It may even bring happiness."