A Showdown in Sweden Between Pirates and Police

However, when it comes to the whole getting-stuff-for-free-on-the-Internet debate, I have yet to see a more trenchant analysis than that of Canadian rockers, the Barenaked Ladies: "When the Gap went online, T-shirts didn't become free."

And You Thought Real Soccer Was Boring

Just when I'm sure we're living in a modern age where anything is possible, just when I get excited about technological advancements and gee-whiz gadgetry, just when I think my personal rocket pack is right around the corner, I run across something like this.

Popular Science's Web site offers a video of robots playing soccer in a competition in Germany, as Europe preps for this summer's World Cup.

Cool, I thought. I pictured adult-sized robots cavorting on a soccer pitch, running with balky, perhaps, but nonetheless human-like movements. Sort of an "I, Robot" meets "Bend It Like Beckham."

Not so much.

Apparently, we're advanced enough to create "robots" that are nearly as dexterous and agile as their Rock 'em Sock 'em forerunners. The soccer played by these robots makes a game of vibrating-board football look like the Rose Bowl. The goal, the attendant story says, is to create "android athletes" that could beat the human championship team of World Cup 2050.

First, they're going to have to be taller than 12 inches. Second, they're going to have to do more than just wobble back and forth and fall over. We're a long way away from a soccer team full of Datas, so if you're feeling at all threatened by technology, just watch this. It'll make you feel better.

To check it out, surf to http://www.washingtonpost.com/ and search for Web Watch for a link .