Friday, June 9, 2006; A21

A hearty Loop welcome to the newest Bush Cabinet member, Interior Secretary Dirk Kempthorne , former senator and Idaho governor, who was formally sworn in on Wednesday.

Midst all the ceremonial hoopla surrounding these first days, there's always the nuts 'n' bolts to take care of. For example, we got a note the other day from Fay S. Iudicello , director of Interior's Office of the Executive Secretariat, about how the new boss wants papers submitted for his signature to look.

She writes that "the complimentary close" -- stuff like "sincerely" -- "and signature block must begin at the center of the document" and that "the secretary's name must be typed at least five lines below the complimentary close."

"The Secretary prefers that every letter of his name be capitalized."

Meanwhile, even before he was sworn in, KEMPTHORNE was planning a fine trip -- let's hope in winter -- to the U.S. territories in the Pacific -- American Samoa, Guam and the Northern Mariana Islands, which are part of Interior's bailiwick.

In a brief speech here Tuesday night to an annual gathering of hundreds of government and business leaders and other Pacific Islanders, KEMPTHORNE promised to visit the islands as soon as possible.

And he showed that he didn't need that guidance outlined in a recent Loop column about how to work the war in Iraq into any and all speeches.

After noting the aid money that Interior gives the islands each year, KEMPTHORNE said: "Finally, I'd like to say that whatever we've given the Pacific community, you've given us back much more." Very nice segue. Seamless.

"We're grateful for the enormous sacrifice the Pacific has made fighting the war on terror," he said, meaning the war in Iraq. The number of American Samoans "killed in Iraq, on a per capita basis, is almost thirteen and a half times the U.S. national average," he said of the five from there who've been killed. And the "per capita death rate in Iraq" for the Northern Mariana Islands -- a former Jack Abramoff client and a place where policies on sweatshops and the commercial sex trade were dictated by former House majority leader Tom DeLay (R-Tex.) -- is nearly five times the national average. Three troops from the Northern Marianas have been killed in Iraq.

KEMPTHORNE went on, singling out some of the dignitaries, or their relatives, who served in Iraq, before concluding: "On behalf of the United States of America, I just want to say: Thank you, and God bless you, and God bless those we have lost and their loved ones."

Neatly done.

Speaking of Interior, department spokesman John Wright is retiring after a long military and department career. His agency colleagues paid tribute to the highly regarded Wright at a May 25 send-off at the south penthouse of the main Interior building. There was even a surprise visit from former deputy secretary J. Steven Griles .

Federal prosecutors have been looking into Griles's ties to Abramoff, who once offered him a job. Griles, who was No. 2 from 2001 to 2004, has said he never tried to intercede on behalf of Abramoff's clients, but e-mails released by a Senate committee show more than half a dozen contacts Griles had with Abramoff or with a woman working as the lobbyist's go-between.

His appearance at the goodbye party raised a few eyebrows, we're told.

It's not too late to attend what looks to be an excellent meeting starting today in Hawaii featuring a former Canadian defense minister, diplomats, international law experts and others.

The topic? "Whether extraterrestrial civilizations are visiting the earth, how diplomacy might be conducted with them and the impact on world peace."

The keynote speaker, according to a news release from the Exopolitics Institute, is former Canadian defense minister Paul Hellyer , who we're told "will be discussing whether humanity is up to the diplomatic task of achieving peace with extraterrestrials."

Another dignitary expected to attend the three-day conference is John W. McDonald , who has represented the United States at "four United Nations conferences" and is now head of the Institute for Multi-Track Diplomacy. His topic, naturally, will be "how diplomatic initiatives, some involving private citizens, might be conducted when and if extraterrestrials visit earth."

And retired Air Force Capt. Robert Salas will discuss a 1967 incident in which "UFOs shut down a Strategic Air command facility" in Montana and disabled its Minuteman nukes. (Unclear whether they reopened it.)

The Exopolitics Institute was founded by Michael E. Salla , a professor and researcher in international peace and conflict resolution at American University from 1996 through 2004.

Although the conference starts today, there's no reason to miss a minute of it. Just get your Star Trek transporter to beam you over there. It's fast, safe, and you save airfare. Might even pick up some frequent-flyer miles.