Sunday, November 5, 2006; C13

Love Is the Best Way Forward

For some, defining moments come early in life -- after the unexpected death of a loved one, or after suffering a physical or emotional trauma -- and strong spiritual influences are easy to identify.

Others seem to graze through life, look up and suddenly realize that someone or something has had a much more profound impact upon them than they'd thought.

I'm in that latter category. It wasn't until I lost my grandmother, Alpha Robertson, four years ago that I understood how deeply she influenced my spiritual beliefs.

You see, Alpha Robertson had long been a hero to many. Forty-three years ago, she'd lost her youngest child, Carole Robertson, to the 16th Street Baptist Church bombing in Birmingham, one of our nation's most shameful examples of domestic terrorism.

But to me, she was Granny. She was the no-nonsense, book-reading, old-movie-loving, witty woman who filled up a room without even trying. She declined to wear grief like a badge. She refused to court hate in any of its subtleties, declaring to all that it "would do no good." Instead, she put her spirit on the front lines, willing it to be all that the Bible says it should be, compelling it to do all that God promised it would do, refusing to make a fuss over life and its peculiar ways.

Part of it was her core ethic: After the bombing, depression was a luxury she could ill afford when there were her husband, Alvin, other children, aging parents and myriad community issues that needed her intellectual and emotional presence. The other, larger part, which even she may not have fully appreciated at the time, was that God uses people to manifest his Word. He needed a living example of love -- a love that transcends hatred, bitterness, destruction and premeditation. He needed a living example of forgiveness -- the kind that truly lets go and looks forward. He needed a living example of understanding -- the type that can trust in a larger purpose even in the face of untold personal sacrifice. He needed a walking example of these things, and he used her.

So though much of what I know about God comes from the Bible and my own experiences, I know firsthand about the power of his love because my grandmother tested it and trusted it. What I know for sure, thanks to her example, is that the way forward -- through the very worst of circumstances -- is love.

-- Jamellah Ellis, Bowie

I was born into a family of atheists.

My uncle had a rare blood disease, and at one point he went into cardiac arrest while in the hospital. He was clinically dead for four minutes before being resuscitated.

When he came back to life, he told my mother that he had gone to a place that was so beautiful that words could not describe it. He saw a light and knew that the light was God.

But somehow, he knew that it wasn't his time yet. He knew he had to come back to life on earth, although he didn't want to leave that beautiful place.

He told my mother that after a lifetime of being an atheist, he now knew that there was a God and that, when his time came, he would be so happy to go back to the place he saw. A week later he died.

This changed my entire life.

I began reading books about people who had near-death experiences, and then I read "Conversations With God" by Neale Donald Walsch and many more spiritual books.

I now have a real relationship with God. I have asked for the impossible, and it has come to me -- and there is no way that I could ever believe that God is not right here with me. I thank Him every day of my life. Sometimes I get angry at Him, but I always love Him and try to do what I know God would consider loving.

I will never be a part of any religion. Every religion is "man-made" and distorts God's true message that love is all there is. Some seem to teach hate more than love, and others are nothing more than traditions to me.

But knowing God has made me a better person, and I love knowing that God is here.

I guess this is my religion. It works for me. My church or temple is wherever I am because I always feel that I'm in God's house. I think we all are if we would just realize it.

-- Carol Miller, Rochester, N.Y.

I was born into a family of atheists.

My uncle had a rare blood disease, and at one point he went into cardiac arrest while in the hospital. He was clinically dead for four minutes before being resuscitated.

When he came back to life, he told my mother that he had gone to a place that was so beautiful that words could not describe it. He saw a light and knew that the light was God.

But somehow, he knew that it wasn't his time yet. He knew he had to come back to life on earth, although he didn't want to leave that beautiful place.

He told my mother that after a lifetime of being an atheist, he now knew that there was a God and that, when his time came, he would be so happy to go back to the place he saw. A week later he died.

This changed my entire life.

I began reading books about people who had near-death experiences, and then I read "Conversations With God" by Neale Donald Walsch and many more spiritual books.

I now have a real relationship with God. I have asked for the impossible, and it has come to me -- and there is no way that I could ever believe that God is not right here with me. I thank Him every day of my life. Sometimes I get angry at Him, but I always love Him and try to do what I know God would consider loving.

I will never be a part of any religion. Every religion is "man-made" and distorts God's true message that love is all there is. Some seem to teach hate more than love, and others are nothing more than traditions to me.

But knowing God has made me a better person, and I love knowing that God is here.

I guess this is my religion. It works for me. My church or temple is wherever I am because I always feel that I'm in God's house. I think we all are if we would just realize it.

-- Carol Miller, Rochester, N.Y.