Like the Nation, Military Families Divided on Iraq

On Wednesday, the day the Iraq Study Group report was released, at least 11 U.S. service members were killed. So far this month, more than 30 have died.

A poll conducted last week by the Associated Press found that 63 percent of respondents did not expect a stable, democratic government to take root in Iraq, up from 54 percent in June.

All the talk of changing course in Iraq by people who have never taken up arms there has worn on Malia Fry, whose husband, Marine Gunnery Sgt. John Fry, 28, was killed while disarming a bomb in March.

"I don't want him to have died for nothing," said Fry, who has three young children and lives near Waco, Tex. "I want us to finish the job."

Marine Lance Cpl. Eric W. Herzberg's faith in the war, like that of much of the country, waned as the conflict dragged on, said his mother, Gina Barnhurst. But when his unit was called, Herzberg, 20, of Severna Park, went without complaint, because "Marines are not political," Barnhurst said. "They do what they're asked to do. They do it for their country. They do it for us."

And that's why she believes political leaders should think about the death of her son -- and the deaths of others -- as they decide what to do next in Iraq.

It has been nearly a year since Hecker's son, a West Point graduate and father of four, was killed south of Baghdad when a roadside bomb exploded next to his Humvee. She still keeps a tissue handy to blot away the tears that so often rise when she thinks about him: how he was a soldier and a scholar, a student of warfare and literature who had developed a taste for fine wine and rich coffee. But her loss does not mean American forces should leave Iraq, she said. Her son wouldn't want that.

Hecker, of Vienna, worries that the good things happening in Iraq are being suppressed by the media or buried under the din of politicians seeking office.

"If we had all stood firm on this, it would have sent a message to the terrorists," she said. "The more divided that we were, the more opportunity they saw to be successful by destroying our national will."

What Hecker sees as harmful dissent, Yvonne Green of Baltimore believes is democracy at work. The Iraq Study Group recommendation to draw down combat troops was long overdue, to her mind. And she thinks it doesn't go far enough.

"They still aren't bringing the troops home immediately," she said. "If you're going to pull them out, do it immediately."

Still, the report boosted her belief that Iraq is a lost cause, and when she heard about it on the news, she thought: "What took you so long?"