Time Does Not Bend for Democrats, but the Congressional Record Does

It's not going to take long for the House Democrats to get comfortable in the majority. They got off to an excellent start last week, continuing the venerable tradition of riding roughshod over the minority. That's what gives the House its special charm.

But it may be they're thinking their powers are limitless. For example, new Rules Committee Chairman Louise M. Slaughter (D-N.Y.), speaking on the House floor during the debate Thursday on the new ethics package, said: "Let me just yield myself about 30 seconds or 45 seconds, whichever comes first."

Now wait a minute. Even the chairman of the Rules Committee can't violate the laws of time. No matter what, 30 is going to come before 45. Except in the "Back to the Future" movies.

And then, of course, history got a little massaging as the Congressional Record cleaned up her remarks: "I would like to yield myself about 30 seconds, 45 perhaps, just to respond for a moment," is how the Record recorded it.

Retired 'in Place,' but Not in Iraq

Keeping up with . . . April Glaspie. Saddam Hussein's execution brought back thoughts of his early years, when he was a hideous dictator and murderer of his own people but steadfastly supported by Washington as a bulwark against the ayatollahs in Iran.

Things soured, of course, with his invasion of Kuwait, which he launched just days after U.S. Ambassador Glaspie visited him to warn that he should settle his border dispute with Kuwait by peaceful means.

Glaspie's promising diplomatic career naturally went into a tailspin after she was hung out to dry for following U.S. policy. A gifted Arabist, Glaspie worked in Somalia with the United Nations for a while, then worked in the State Department as director of the office of Southern African Affairs, a significant demotion.

There was no way she was going to get a Senate-confirmed post, but she did manage to get a job as consul general in beautiful Cape Town, in the late 1990s, and then, as diplomats often do, retired "in place" down there.

When we called last week, Glaspie, who raises horses in Cape Town, said she didn't want to share her thoughts on Saddam's demise. But she thanked us for calling.

Wanted: Brave Writers

Excellent employment opportunity for nation-builders! The State Department has contracted DynCorp International, which has accumulated vast experience running that nifty police training program in Iraq, to create an army for the government of Liberia.

DynCorp, the job announcement says, "is to assist . . . in recruiting, training and equipping an armed military force from the ground up beginning with 2,000 personnel the first year, consisting of . . . two light motorized infantry battalions and a support battalion."

The specific job is for a "ministry of defense technical writer mentor," where you'll "write standard operating procedures for proposal to the ministry of defense" and do various other writing and communications tasks. The pay is "unspecified," but we're certain it will be competitive.

They're looking ideally for retired military or Defense or State department officials with "experience in Africa." Some places in the continent can be a bit dangerous at times, but not to worry. The ad highlights that "full medical and death and dismemberment coverage available." Dismemberment?

Teaching History Without Elaboration

Sign up now! Former State Department counselor Philip Zelikow is teaching two history courses at the University of Virginia this semester, according to the school's Web site. One, History 100, is an introductory seminar entitled "Explaining the Choices of Government." Mmm . . . to surge or not to surge? To stand up or stand down? To cut or to run?

The second course is about World War II. This "discusses the causes and course of the Second World War," the blurb says. "The importance of the war to modern history and the shadows it still casts over contemporary politics and culture need no elaboration." Must not be a high-credit course.

A Job for the Commitment-Phobic

Job alert! Secretary of Labor Elaine Chao is looking for a new public-affairs chief. The incumbent, Randy Clerihue, announced in a Dec. 21 internal e-mail that he was leaving after barely three months in the job. This could set the world indoor record for brevity for a Senate-confirmed position.

"After careful consideration," Clerihue wrote, "I have decided to tender my resignation as assistant secretary for public affairs, effective by the end of January. This is not a decision I reached lightly, but the nature and demands of the job are such that I am finding it impossible to fulfill my duties to my family. . . . I do not know what I will be doing next, other than spending some quality time with my wife and three young boys."

Three young boys and no job? Must have wanted out quickly. Clerihue had been at the Pension Benefit Guaranty Corp. for more than four years before going to Labor, and he worked for think tanks, trade associations and the Hill before that. We're told he shouldn't have trouble finding a soft landing.

His replacement would be Chao's fourth public-affairs chief, not counting an acting chief in the early part of the administration. In the past 18 months or so, public-affairs departures include two deputy assistant secretaries and four press secretaries.