Udderly Ridiculous

"Danny, are you drunk right now?"

That was a critic asking DeVito whether he was intoxicated at the Q&A session for FX's "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia."

Which of course was silly. It was clear he wasn't drunk. He wasn't sitting on Rosie O'Donnell's lap, or regaling the critics with his impression of President Bush: White House Chimp.

DeVito recently made quite a splash when a video of his odd-ish appearance on "The View" to promote his flick "Deck the Halls" turned up on YouTube. During his visit with the View-ettes, DeVito, who acknowledged he'd been out late drinking with George Clooney the night before, slurred his speech as he described his amorous night with his wife at the White House in which they trashed the Lincoln Bedroom and got bleeped several times doing his Bush Chimp routine before hopping onto Rosie's lap.

At the press tour, DeVito continued to stick by his story that he was just tired that day and his strange behavior was the result of a "nap."

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Tori Spelling came to the press tour to chat about her new Oxygen network reality series, "Tori & Dean: Inn Love," in which the crazy-in-love Spelling and Dean McDermott, a.k.a. Husband No. 2, run a bed-and-breakfast and have a baby, all while being "outrageously famous," as Oxygen put it.

Given the divorce rate of C-list couples who have subjected their marriage to reality-television scrutiny -- Jessica and Nick, Kathy Griffin and whatshisname come to mind -- critics wanted to know what makes them think they would survive this show.

"We're going to be the exception, not the rule," McDermott said firmly.

"Yes," added Tori.

Asked if she felt pressure to live up to Jessica Simpson's tour de force performance as Jessica Simpson on the reality series "Newlyweds," Tori said emphatically, "No, because I know what tuna is," recalling Jessica's confusion over Chicken of the Sea.

Do either of them have any experience running a bed-and-breakfast?

McDermott said he had "some restaurant experience."

Of course, you and I know every actor has "restaurant experience." It's called "waiting on tables."

"And I just have really good style, so I thought I could spruce up the B&B," Tori added.

Besides, Tori added, having an actual thought, B&Bs had been good for them because they conceived their child at one in Ottawa. Which smelled a bit like pee, McDermott noted.

And, they insist they are going to be hands-on with the running of the place, though Tori says, "I don't clean toilets," and "I'm not all about breakfast because I'm usually not up early enough, but that's how we're modernizing it. I'm more into happy hours and hors d'oeuvres."