'Idol's' Trying Times

Mr. Urban Amish, Troy Benham, follows. He's never seen "American Idol," does not own a "broadcast television setup in my home."

He sings them a song that involves spit dripping into someone's face. And roaches. We're not familiar with that tune.

The judges begin to lacerate him; he puts up a good fight.

"I didn't say I was great. I didn't say I was the best and I certainly didn't say I was the next American Idol," Benham says.

Next, Jesse Holloway walks out midway through his audition, saying he's "real nervous right now." He takes a drink and returns.

"Why did you come back into the room?" Simon asks. "When you left, for once we were on the same page."

Outside the audtion room, Jesse unloads, saying Randy "needs to wipe off the damned makeup he's got on his face."

Which is funny, because we were thinking that Randy was looking much prettier this season for reasons we could not explain. Thank you, Jesse Holloway, for providing answers.

"When was the last time Paula made a record?" Holloway continues, now on a roll. "They can kiss my [heinie]. They need to be fired because they don't know what they're talking about."

Charles Moody auditions next -- dressed in stars-and-stripes bathrobe, top hat and boxing gloves. He's going to "knock out this performance." Singing opera.

Moody unnerves the judges.

"I don't know what I'm doing on this show anymore," Simon says. "The fact we're taking this seriously is disturbing. . . . We're acting like it's normal."