'Idol's' Trying Times

Cue up treacly sympathy music:

"My life wasn't easy, my mom struggles with drug addiction. I guess she can't help it," 16-year-old Denise Jackson confides to the "Idol" camera. "I was born as a crack baby. . . . They were going to send me to a foster home. My grandmother came and rescued me. . . . There is nothing wrong with me; I was actually born with a gift."

The judges are given notes on each auditioner; they're not gonna mess with Denise. She sails through to Hollywood.

"I'm the first person in my family who made something of himself!" she shouts jubilantly.

Trista Giese does a Bert Lahr-as-Cowardly-Lion impression from "The Wizard of Oz." Wrong show. Wrong century.

The appearance of Stephen Horst, alleged singing teacher, sets off the major role reversal of the evening. Randy really goes off on Horst, saying his students should all demand their money back.

"Randy -- enough!" Simon barks as Randy gets more and more in Horst's face, adding later, "Did you get abused by a vocal coach in some former life?"

Two auditions invoked the "American Idol" Military Immunity Clause -- show up in uniform and you're guaranteed to be sent to the next round.

Jarrod Fowler is a 27-year-old intelligence specialist on the USS Ronald Reagan. Fowler says he won the "Reagan Idol" competition on the Reagan. Fowler says it brings him a sense of pride knowing he represents all "these people who are actually defending our freedom."

"I think people will like you," Simon coos. The other judges meekly follow suit.

"This is for the Reagan," Fowler says outside the audition room.

Rachel Jackson meanwhile, works in Dad's body shop and her husband is in Baghdad now. She joined the Army Reserve.

"You guys are sooooo cute!" she tells the judges. Her song starts okay, but she inadvertently switches keys at least once.

Even so, her fatigues camouflage her lack of talent. Simon notes she started off well and "fell apart" toward the end. Which under other conditions would be the lead-in line to getting the hook. But instead he says while she was "not one of the best," "I think people would like you." The other judges agree glassy-eyed, and Jackson, too, is on her way to Hollywood.