Miami Slice

The lighter side of the Bears' and Colts' run-up to the Super Bowl

(Kevork Djansezian - AP)

Just Another Friday Night in South Beach

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Any evening that begins with sharing a bus ride with Andy Rooney and ends at a party with Carmen Electra can't be all that bad. Friday night in South Beach has to be all-time off the hook.

Saw rapper Biz Markie (one of our faves) chilling in the lobby of the Hyatt -- the hotel we wish we were staying in, although we must report we are making friends with the roaches at our place -- and gave a shout-out to Hall of Famer Deacon Jones, who was holding court outside, then hopped on the media shuttle and listened as Rooney began busting people's chops. He wasn't as crabby as we expected, but we thought we might be privy to a full-scale blowup when the volunteers informed us it could be 50 minutes to get to the beach. Alas, Rooney took it in stride.

Spent most of the night at the "Leather and Laces" party hosted by former Playboy Playmates Electra, Jenny McCarthy and Kelly Monaco. We caught up with them on the red carpet, and they did not disappoint. Electra was a crowd favorite, even rewarding a haggard-looking fan's request for a kiss (on the cheek). McCarthy, a Chicago native, was actually up for the game. "I would be damned to hell if I wasn't rooting for the Bears," she said.

Inside, Kato Kaelin -- you know, O.J. Simpson's houseguest -- attracted much attention, sadly, and was actually asked to sign autographs. The club, Chakra Lounge, was top-notch, but you had to feel for some of the littles who spent $300 just to get in. For that price they were confined to the lower level, where the chances of running into Carmen and her gang were nil.

Two models -- who were drinking like sailors -- were getting approached by men fairly constantly -- often bloated, middle-aged dudes who were drinking Coronas and had no chance.

During one of their endless trips to the second-floor bar, a short, balding, 50-ish guy pointed to them from across the room, high-fived his buddy, and made a beeline. Instantly, we knew this would not end well. He tapped them on the shoulder and grunted, "Are you guys Bears fans?"

They had no idea what he was talking about. He asked again. "What? What are you talking about?" one of them finally asked. "There are no bears in Florida."

There you have it.

The Other Game in Town

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South Beach was overtaken with models Saturday for Ocean Drive magazine's annual "Volleypalooza." Seventeen modeling agencies sent their best and brightest to the tournament, which drew a massive crowd. Olympic swimmer Amanda Beard hosted a swimsuit show, and the taunting between Colts and Bears fans drowned out nearly everything. The event jammed South Beach, where there was no room to walk for a seven-block stretch. . . . Redskins players Clinton Portis and Santana Moss are most definitely BMOSB (Big Men On South Beach), but there are a handful of teammates here as well, including Jason Campbell, Derrick Dockery, Rock Cartwright, Chris Samuels and Todd Wade. Owner Daniel Snyder threw his party a few nights back at the Versace Mansion. We think our invitation got lost in the mail. . . . Major props to Jeremy Riffle, king of South Beach P.R. We kicked off Saturday night at the MarketAmerica.com party, checking out J. Lo's performance with the beautiful people.

QUOTABLE

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"Parties, parties, parties, parties, parties. That's it. One after the other. The Super Bowl means absolutely nothing to me. I'm here to see Prince."

Model/actress Kelly Monaco, on why she's in Miami

BY THE NUMBERS

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Models playing in the beach volleyball tournament. Sigh.

-- Jason La Canfora