Overachieving Students Hear a New Message: Lighten Up

The frenzy is also fueled by the high-achieving culture that is a part of the Washington metropolitan life.

Berger said she's no different from other Washington area parents, who push their children to work hard and do their best. But along with that, she said, she wants to make sure her son spends his high school years doing more than just building a résumé.

"As a parent, you begin to wonder, what kind of situation have I put my children into because there's too much stress and too much pressure," Berger said.

Bekki Sims had the same battle with her daughter, Lillie. When Lillie wanted to add AP English to her class schedule at Whitman, Sims argued that honors English had a reading list that might be more appealing. Ultimately, Lillie agreed to take honors rather than AP English.

Students say they hear what their parents and counselors are saying, but they also say they feel like they can't slow down.

So what's a student to do?

"Keep things in perspective," said Maggie Tsang, 17, a senior at Holton Arms. "It's important to realize there are bigger things ahead."

Added Kevin Burke, a junior at Oakton: "Just know you'll be okay. College will be easier."

Staff researcher Meg Smith contributed to this report.