And for Best Performance at a Lectern . . .

Forget movies! Two-time Academy Award nominee Will Smith should win an Oscar for his masterly performance at yesterday's symposium hosted by the Motion Picture Association of America.

The MPAA held the first "Business of Show Business" conference at the Reynolds Center to tout the economic impact of La-La Land, cozy up to lawmakers, and push legislation for intellectual property rights (good) and against digital piracy (bad). Complex, super-wonk issues -- which is apparently why they got Mr. Smith to come to Washington to kick things off with a sound-bite-happy charm offensive:

Self-deprecating joke. Smith, dapper in a black suit and silver tie, said an elderly couple stopped him on the way in to say how much they loved his work. "We're going to vote for you. We love you, Barack!" Knowing laughs all around. (Chances it really happened: 10 percent.)

Props to the little people. The "real Hollywood," he said, are all the folks behind the scenes: writers, carpenters, crews -- the ones really hurt by illegal piracy. "It's not just me and Tom!" said the $20-million-per-picture star to hearty laughter.

Backhanded plug. Movie crews pump $200,000 a day into the local economy, he pointed out. Like in, say, New York City, where he's shooting "I Am Legend" (last man alive vs. bloodthirsty vampires). "It's going to be great," he promised.

Pity the French. While in Paris for the premiere of "The Pursuit of Happyness," a French journalist asked Smith why Americans are obsessed with Hollywood's happy endings. It was then, Smith said seriously, that he realized that's the very reason those poor, tired and huddled masses came to this country. "The Hollywood ending is a direct descendant of the American dream. . . . That's why I make movies."

A-list name drop. On a trip to South Africa, the actor told Nelson Mandela,"I feel what I do is inconsequential." The wise man shared that while in prison, he was allowed to see one movie every six months, and "In the Heat of the Night" gave him faith to fight on. "Don't ever underestimate what you do," Mandela told Smith. Impressed nods.

Smith slipped offstage as MPAA's Dan Glickman cracked, "You know, he wouldn't be a bad presidential candidate." The rest of the day was full of earnest panel discussions ("The Impact of Show Business and Intellectual Property: America's Growth Engine") -- with politicians, studio heavyweights and directors (Steven Soderbergh, Taylor Hackford, Michael Apted) debating downloads and trade imbalances. The symposium ended with a dinner last night honoring Clint Eastwood, who received the first Jack Valenti Humanitarian Award for reaching out "positively and respectfully to all countries, creeds and cultures." Except the press -- no media allowed.

GET THIS . . .

Sen. Barack Obama is attempting to kick his longtime smoking habit as he gears up to run for president, a family friend told the Chicago Tribune this week. Valerie Jarrett said the 45-year-old Illinois Democrat isn't just concerned about the political implications of a role model being caught with a cigarette -- there's also the basic, old-school concern about, you know, his health.

San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom is getting counseling for a drinking problem after admitting to an affair with an aide's wife. The divorced Newsom, 39, told reporters Monday that alcohol is no excuse for his behavior but that he thinks he'll "be a better person without alcohol in my life." Sound familiar? But no, the former winery owner isn't going to the rehab clinic Mark Foley went to, or the one Miss USA went to, or the one Isaiah Washington is going to -- just an outpatient center in town.

A California judge issued an arrest warrant for actor Daniel Baldwin -- brother of Alec, Billy et al. -- after he failed to show up in court yesterday on charges of "unlawful taking of a vehicle."

HEY, ISN'T THAT . . . ?

Steven Tyler, signing a guitar for a fan in the lobby of the Watergate Hotel Monday night. The 58-year-old Aerosmith frontman (in town along with Joaquin Phoenix for a peace conference at Lisner Auditorium) was all taut cheekbones, tight black-and-tan pants, brown suede coat and cool boots -- "like a Dolce & Gabbana sex elf," said a witness -- with a blond woman and a Diet Coke. In the bar just steps away, Sufjan Stevens's bandmates were waiting for the indie-pop star after his KenCen show. Yes, you heard correctly: The Watergate. Go figure.