Does This Give You Paws . . .
About owning a dog?
In my neighborhood, on the same block are two upscale stores catering to dog owners. These stores sell things like home-baked dog pastries; dog bonbons; dog eclairs; dog biscotti displayed on silver trays; scientifically designed, IQ-boosting dog chew toys; and, I swear, fully up-holstered dog-size chairs and couches.
Appalled? Me, too. This crap is starting to clutter my house.
  (Eric Shansby) |
When you have a new puppy and two pet stores a walkable distance from your home, you are going to succumb. Murphy has chew toys and fuzzy toys and squeak toys and rope pulls and bones molded into healthful shapes under the direction of canine dentists. All of this stuff was in her toy box the other day, when we found her playing with a bag of pins.
That's the thing about dogs. They're idiots. But they're also interesting, because each dog is idiotic in his or her own way.
For example, when my daughter visits us, she brings her dog, Mattingly. Mattie would never dream of eating pins. She eats the crotches out of underpants. When Mattie is around, underpants must be carefully guarded -- kept out of reach, like the good china. Things can get a little testy.
Wife: (accusingly) Look at . . . this!
(Holds out a waistband with two shredded, dangly flaps.)
Me: I put them away! I swear it!
Wife: Where?
Me: Uh, in the hamper.
Wife: But you didn't remember to put the microwave on TOP of the hamper, did you? DID you?
It's not that the dogs refuse to use conventional toys. They like squeak toys, and because of the two high-end pet stores, their squeak toys tend to be complex, virtuoso items, capable of attaining more than one pitch. Mattingly and Murphy tend to use these toys at family times, around the electronic hearth, when we're watching a movie on TV.
