Holding Tight to Life In the Shadow of Death

The Hayfield community and area businesses have rallied around the sisters, not only with moral support but with a donation table at home games run by team volunteer Arlene Yates, the mother of junior player Heather Thornton. At Christmas, the girls' basketball team surprised the Appiahs with three tables stacked with gifts, each sister's presents wrapped with donated paper, boxes and tape. Betty's gifts were in gold paper, Renee's in red and Jessica's a design pattern. Others have given the girls computers and clothing.

"We all realized that we have to be there for her and just make sure we're her outlet and she can come to us anytime when she's feeling down," said Karimah Janneh, one of the other seniors on the team. "She could cry with us. She could depend on us. We wanted to make her feel comfortable. We didn't force her to talk about anything. If she wanted to talk, then we would be there to listen to her."

Appiah's handling of the tragedy has been troubling at times to her coaches, who speak of her with puzzled admiration.

Coach Richard Carlock and Walsh, one of his assistants, each spent more than 20 years in the military and have seen young servicemen handle family deaths in a variety of ways, none with the relative calm that Appiah has shown.

"I don't keep it inside, either," Appiah said, anticipating a question. "I'm always happy."

Ron Williams, who organizes team activities and whose daughter, Chantell, is a sophomore with the Hawks, has drawn from Appiah's strength; his 75-year-old father died in late November.

"She had two die and I had just one, and I'm still crying every now and then, and I'm 51 years old," Williams said. "Just being around her, her attitude and personality have rubbed off on all of us. That makes me feel like I can do most anything, just watching her."

The day after the shootings, Appiah and her sisters stopped by Hayfield basketball practice. Less than three weeks later, after missing most of the preseason, the 6-foot-3 Appiah scored 19 points in the team's season opener, and she has scored in double figures in 18 of 20 games headed into the regular season finale tonight against Lee.

Appiah, who turned 18 on Jan. 27, said her parents used to encourage her to play basketball whenever she needed to clear her head, and that advice has helped her deal with their deaths. "Basketball is like another way for me to calm down, get my mind off of things," she said. She receives counseling in school, and with her sisters at an outside facility. She also goes to services at the churches her parents attended, Word of Life in Springfield and World Gospel Church in Alexandria.

"Sometimes I'm a little more concerned about her than I am about even the youngest [sister] because sometimes when you despair . . . you get to the point where one day everything just falls on you and you break down," said the Appiahs' uncle and guardian, Robert Ansah, a pastor at United Christian Church in Montgomery County. "Basketball is good and has given her an outlet and all, but you have to try to deal with the reality of it because if you don't, she can just break down one day when basketball is through."

Walsh, whose daughter, Bailey, also is a senior on the team, has been wary of that possible breakdown during the Hawks' 5-15 season, particularly when Appiah would grow frustrated with opponents banging on her underneath the basket.

"There's always a part of me in every game that's kind of on the edge of my seat thinking, 'Is something going to happen that's going to make it all come out?' " Walsh said.