Generous Gestures

A. I have no problem with you criticizing the PGA in this area. I do have a problem with you sideswiping me in the process.

Q. With all your political connections, do you know if the Kennedys stand to make more money off the ban of online gambling than they did off the enactment of prohibition? (Kris Shuty; Cleveland)

A. It's refreshing to see a sports fan with pre-ESPN knowledge of American history.

Q. What is more likely to happen -- you get invited back to the University of Maryland to give the commencement address or Rolling Rock management convinces Anheuser-Busch to move to Latrobe and begin putting Budweiser in green bottles? (Dave Andera; Milwaukee)

A. If I were allowed in College Park and still drank Rolling Rock, I'd buy you one there.

Q. Hank Aaron says he won't be in the ballpark when Barry Bonds breaks his home run record. Where's he going to be? (Michael Gray; Columbia, S.C.)

A. Well, Aaron is good friends with Bud Selig -- I bet you the commish has that Extra Innings cable package, so Hammerin' Hank can just watch the game from his crib.

Q. Is ESPN, ESPN2 or ESPN Classic showing poker at this very moment? (Barry Snyder; Houston)

A. I'm sorry, what's the problem here?

Q. Where did all your hair go? (Joe Weller; Colorado Springs)

A. Some of it gets cut off monthly by my stylist, the rest has been leaving of its own accord.

Q. Do you think the careers of Drew Bledsoe and Ki-Jana Carter would have worked out better if they had chosen Jerry Maguire over Bob Sugar? (John Desmond; Pittsburgh)