String of Violence Has Shaped but Not Hardened Kids

Vickie Marx ticks off the markers in the life of her eldest child, 15-year-old Danny: the Columbine school massacre when he was 7. The Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks when he was 9. The sniper attacks when he was 10. The Iraq war, which erupted when he was 11. And now the Virginia Tech shootings.

This generation of children, said Marx, 45, of McLean, has "lived with -- regrettably, sadly -- an ongoing barrage."

In a week when the nation has struggled to absorb the toll of America's deadliest shooting by an individual, many families in the Washington region faced it with a strong sense of the familiar. The Virginia massacre comes as yet another close-up horror for children who know violence through extraordinary events.

"It's been just sort of a wild ride," said Alyssa Navarrete, 18, a senior at Annandale High School. "Our generation kind of had to grow up pretty quickly. We were in seventh or eighth grade when the snipers were around. It sort of forced you to realize the world was bigger than your own back yard at a really young age. I think we're all probably stronger for it, but it does affect people for sure."

Last week, many students at Annandale High School openly grieved for Mary Read, a 2006 graduate who was killed at Virginia Tech, she said.

Coincidentally, Navarrete had put her commitment letter and $400 deposit to Virginia Tech in the mailbox the day of the shootings. "Just the way that everybody down there has come together -- that's a family I want to be a part of."

How children responded varied widely. There were questions. Sadness. Tears. Anger. Seeming detachment. Some focused on their own safety, others on grief-stricken families. Like their parents, they dwelled on why the rampage began -- its senselessness.

Joelle Griffith, 11, heard about the shootings in her technology class at Mitchellville School in Bowie that afternoon when she logged on to the computer. Since then, she has been following it closely on the Internet and on television. Her parents have been reassuring, but "it got me kind of scared about going to college," she said, "knowing that there are killers that we might not know about that might be everywhere."

Several child psychologists said that children might, for a time, worry about being alone, be afraid to go to school, fear the dark or feel concern for their parents' safety. Children with anxiety, depression or other problems might be more deeply affected, said therapist Britt H. Rathbone, whose Rockville practice treats teenagers.

There is almost certainly a cumulative effect of so many horrific incidents, said Katherine S. Newman, a Princeton University sociologist who wrote the book "Rampage: The Social Roots of School Shootings."

"I think many Americans will look on this period as unsettled and unstable," Newman said. "These violent spectacles are very rare, but they leave deep tracks and shake our ability to judge whether a setting is safe or dangerous."

The task of shielding children from the full impact of the Virginia Tech shootings -- or even interpreting it -- has become difficult for parents in an age when the blitz of news from print and televised sources is intensified by 24-7 Web sites and instant messaging.