Office Awareness Can Head Off Abuse at Home

The more a company does in the way of domestic violence prevention and protection, the more likely employees will come forward when they have a problem, Wells said.

"You have a chance to respond in the scope of the workplace and get them resources. You need to have a message from as high a level as possible that this is a commitment we have," Wells said.

Kaiser Permanente started its domestic abuse program partly because it so often helped patients with similar issues, said Brigid McCaw, director of Kaiser's Family Violence Prevention Program. The company has a Web site that includes stories from employees who have survived domestic violence. It is part education, part victim support.

One Kaiser employee, who spoke on condition of anonymity because a relative works for the company and she doesn't want his co-workers to know, began to be abused by her alcoholic husband in early 2003. He would rant at her into the early morning hours, chase her to work and threaten her. She confided in the facilities director. "He sat me down and offered me his help," and sent her to the EAP. Her counselors spoke with her manager so days off could not be held against her. She was able to divorce her husband and, with the help of Kaiser, take computer classes and get promoted. She is now a manager.

In addition to educating employees, companies need to keep them safe. In March 2003, an employee's husband was sent away from a Liz Claiborne distribution center because he didn't have security clearance. He returned with a gun. The company's security team got local police involved and locked down the facility, and after a standoff the husband was caught. The company's security practices may have saved lives that day, said Mark Couch, a Claiborne human resources director.

In 2005, 28 percent of reported threats at State Farm were domestic-related. "These are only the ones that are reported. My gut tells me we're only seeing about a third," said Steve Heldstab, a security specialist with State Farm. "Most victims are ashamed."

In the case of Melissa, she called one of the community groups her boss at State Farm recommended and moved out of her house.

She also gave the company a picture of her husband so the guards could watch for him. The company made sure she had an escort to and from her car. Melissa is now happily remarried and still working for State Farm. Melissa spoke on the condition that her last name not be used because her ex-husband is still angry.

"It was just good having a boss over me that was compassionate and understood," she said. She still tells this manager that he saved her life -- something that she truly believes.