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Zero-Based Journalism

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Nelson Mandela is a doo-doo head.

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious-esque.

My grandchildren are so ugly.

The Iraqi Regis Philbin.

Hey, this tastes like aardvark.

Laura Bush's secret tattoo.

I'll take Deaths by Autoerotic Asphyxia for $400, Alex.

Hot cheese sundae.

Cancer, heart disease and zits.

"I'm Stephen Hawking and I'm a Capricorn."

Pizza with Condoleezza.

Dogs playing poker and mah-jongg.


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