Nope, Yup, Nope, Yup

An ontological treatise on flipping coinage

Three months ago in this space, a versatile new word was born. A "googlenope" was defined as a phrase that returns no hits when entered between quotation marks into the Google search engine. Until that day, the word "googlenope" was itself a googlenope. Today, it draws more than 1,000 hits, and the number is growing. The phenomenon has spread to Europe. Indeed, without my knowledge, someone started a Web site, googlenope.com, which is devoted to the art and science of what we shall henceforth call . . . googlenopery.

We at Googlenope International headquarters could not be more proud. But semantic pioneers do not get where they are by resting on their laurels. Today, we further plumb the field by finding new googlenopes, and pairing them with googleyups, phrases that ought to be googlenopes, but aren't.

As always, every time a new googlenope is created and published, it ceases to be a googlenope. In this manner, we shall slowly but steadily create a world where nothing has been left unsaid.

Googlenope: I'd like a middle seat

Googleyup: I'd like to die in a plane crash

Googlenope: world's funniest proofreader

Googleyup: world's funniest mortician

Googlenope: accidentally glued my foot to my dog

Googleyup: accidentally glued my dog to the floor

Googlenope: squalor of the French Riviera

Googleyup: splendor of Hoboken, N.J.

Googlenope: armpit hair topiary