Monday, August 6, 2007; B03
Life is full of little annoyances. Sometimes they are of the two-legged variety. Often they are faceless institutions, dubious policies or things that just refuse to work right. Here are a few of them:
Gratuitous Expressions of Gratitude: No, Thanks
Maybe you've heard from dozens of readers bugged by being thanked in advance, but like campfires in the woods, this trend can't be doused and stomped on too often.
Whether explicit ("Thanks in advance for your contribution!") or implicit ("Thank you for not smoking"), advance thanking says one or more of the following:
"We take it for granted you'll comply with our rule or request, so why waste a 'please'? We'll just calm you with a 'thanks.' "
"Your contribution probably won't be important enough for us to acknowledge or even remember, so accept our gratitude upfront."
"I'm really too busy to keep track of whether you do what I ask, much less send an individual reply."
"Our studies show that customers respond favorably to being thanked, so we decided to do it now while you're still making up your tiny mind."
I once had a rubber stamp made reading "Thank You For Not Thanking Me In Advance" but soon realized that if advance thankers didn't understand why their practice might offend me, they wouldn't get the stamp message, either.
Although I appreciate your having read this, I hope you'll understand if I don't thank you until after it actually runs.
-- Robert L. Miller, Washington
Many callers to radio talk shows begin with "Thank you for taking my call," an unnecessary statement and time waster for all those waiting their turn with a phone stuck to their ear.
If the host didn't take the call, he wouldn't have a show!
-- Larry Boteler, McLean
If There's No Right Way to Take It, Don't Tell MeIt bugs me when someone says, "Don't take this the wrong way, but . . . "
Whenever someone begins a sentence with these words, I simply want to say, "No, thank you. No, thank you. Stop right now. I really am not interested."
I am quite sure they are going to be telling me something I don't want to hear, such as:
"Laura, your project idea is stupid."
"Laura, no one likes your potato salad."
"Laura, you look fat in plaid."
It would probably be more honest for them to say, "I'm going to say something that is going to make you uncomfortable, and I don't want you to react in any way that would make me uncomfortable."
-- Laura Graham Fetters, Bethesda
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