Gonzales Dug His Own Grave, and Many Are Happy to Dance on It

The grave-dancing continued. Sen. Olympia Snowe (R-Maine) said that Gonzales's departure was "in the best interest of our nation." House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) called it "long overdue" and Democratic Party Chairman Howard Dean said it was "about time." Sen. Dianne Feinstein (D-Calif.) scheduled a teleconference. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) vowed that Congress will still "get to the bottom of this mess."

Sen. Arlen Specter (R-Pa.), caught out of position on a trip to Poland, tried to hold a conference call about Gonzales but lost his connection twice. Even without Polish telecommunications woes, Specter would have been no match for Schumer, who brought his full arsenal of cliches to a news conference in New York: "straw [that] broke the camel's back . . . a sinking ship . . . the prevailing winds . . . middle of the road . . . throw down the gauntlet . . . a slam-dunk."

Was Schumer surprised by the announcement?

"I guess I was the first to call for the attorney general to step down," he boasted.

As the senator was finishing, Bush faced the cameras in Texas to complain about the unseemly grave-dancing. "It's sad that we live in a time when a talented and honorable person like Alberto Gonzales is impeded from doing important work because his good name was dragged through the mud for political reasons," the president said of his "reluctant" acceptance of Gonzales's resignation.

More mud awaited Gonzales in the Justice Department conference room, where journalists were in a feisty mood. Several regular Justice reporters arrived for the resignation speech, only to have their building passes confiscated and replaced with one-time "Special Event" passes.

Asked to check the sound system, one of the correspondents played Gonzales at the lectern. "I just thought it was time to spend more time with my family," he announced. The real Gonzales must have expected the worst when he came out to read his resignation statement, because he was preceded on stage by an earpiece-wearing bodyguard.

"I have traveled a remarkable journey, from my home state of Texas to Washington," Gonzales said, shaking his head as he marveled at the journey. His voice thickened as he mentioned his wife, but he recovered in plenty of time to remind listeners of his upbringing as the poor son of Mexican immigrants.

"I have lived the American dream," he said. "Even my worst days as attorney general have been better than my father's best days."

Gonzales's Justice Department, however, has seen better days, if the backdrop behind the attorney general was any indication. It hung like a dangling metaphor: the Department of Justice plaque, suspended from the ceiling with the help of blue masking tape.