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I Needed Help, Not Ostracism

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As a longtime teacher, I know that there are lessons to be learned from my situation. I've learned that honesty can guide you through dissolution into hope. My family is no longer four people living alone together. My wife and I are committed to a new future. My pre-teen daughter endured teasing with grace and has grown in the process. Recently, she asked me how I was feeling. "Pretty down," I replied. Her response was full of insight: "Why don't you go to a meeting?"

Another lesson is that institutions must keep the past an open book and spread the wisdom gained from uncomfortable situations. But that doesn't mean we can't have regrets. UMW can speak for itself, but I regret losing the chance to help students, faculty and staff discuss and deal with compulsion and substance issues. I regret, now that I'm healthy and my problems are cured or managed, that I can't teach and learn at UMW again. These are deep regrets from a permanent and painful loss.

wfrawl@gmail.com

William Frawley works as a language and higher education consultant. He is writing two books about his experiences.

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