He Is Still Alive In Memories and Hearts of Friends

Somber Celebration of a Birthday Soldier Didn't Live to See

They held hands, read poetry, prayed and sang "Happy Birthday," a song that was both sad and celebratory. Today would have been a momentous occasion -- turning 21 -- but, in the chill yesterday afternoon, there were only memories beside a soldier's grave.

Pfc. Justin Davis was killed in Afghanistan when he was 19.

Paula Davis did not want to let the milestone pass without a fitting remembrance of her only child. So 30 friends and relatives joined her at the white marble headstone in Section 60 of Arlington National Cemetery that bears her son's name.

They recalled his spirit, his love for the Army. They talked of celebration and yet could not help but choke back tears. At the end, they released 21 balloons into the pale January sky and watched in silence as the brightly colored orbs drifted up from orderly white rows of military gravestones.

"Because God lives, I know Justin lives on," said his aunt, Penny Spencer, who was in the delivery room the day he was born. "He lives in our hearts. He lives in the wind. . . . He lives everywhere."

The occasion was not unlike other tributes by relatives left behind who mark anniversaries and holidays. Yesterday's birthday party brought together people who covered the range of Justin's life.

There was a cousin he had grown up with, Ashley Davis, 23, who recalled eating watermelon with him and wondering whether the seeds they spit out would produce new melons.

There was a friend from Magruder High School in Rockville, where Justin played football and helped Tyler Murray, 19, get back on track when he was slipping in his classes. "He was like a brother to me," Murray said.

There was his Army recruiter, Sgt. 1st Class Luke Newman, who recalled the day he met Justin, with his "million-dollar" smile and cool confidence, in a high school classroom. And the day he learned that Justin had died in Afghanistan.

"It devastated me," he said, his voice breaking. His grief melded with guilt, he said, as he placed a phone call to Justin's mother. "I felt like it was my fault," he said.

Paula Davis, he recalled, did not see it that way. "She assured me that there was no ill will and Justin died doing what he loved," Newman said.

Yesterday, one of Justin's young cousins, Tre Davis, 12, read a poem to the crowd, and afterward he and his aunt dwelled on some of the words they found most meaningful. They agreed on these lines:

Your heart can be empty because you can't see him

Or you can be full of the love that you shared

Tre talked about how Justin wrestled with him. Barbara Davis recalled the comfort of his bear hugs.

The soldier, who was in the 10th Mountain Division and aspired to be part of a Ranger unit, was killed in June 2006 by mortar fire. His mother said the Army told her it was a friendly fire incident.

His mother described him as big and brash and yet so friendly that "he never met a stranger."

Davis, 52, read aloud a letter Justin wrote after leaving his home in Gaithersburg for boot camp.

The letter began, "Hey, Mom, how's life without your boy?" It went on to thank her for all she had done, raising him as a single mother. "You have loved me and cared for me and turned me into a man by yourself."

She read this beside his headstone, which was decorated with roses, carnations and little rocks painted by an 8-year-old cousin with words including "hero."

Woody Johnson, an uncle, said it did not feel as if so much time had passed since the day the family learned Justin had been killed. His 21st birthday is hard, Johnson said. But, he added, "It's always hard."

After the birthday balloons were released -- a gesture his mother felt Justin would have appreciated -- Davis thanked the others for sharing the day. Everyone was invited for birthday cake and some of his favorite dishes, including fried chicken, potato salad and jambalaya, at her home in Gaithersburg.

"We don't want the world to forget about our children," she said. "That's the thing we fear the most: that people will forget about all of these men and women who gave the ultimate sacrifice."