And the Winner Is . . . Not the Network You Might Think

The glitz and glam of Hollywood A-listers slapping one another on the back edged out the top 12 guy singers on "American Idol." But the Academy Awards could not compete against three nights of "Idol" and so Fox, not ABC, took Oscar week.

Here's a look at the week's knockouts and frumps:

WINNERS

80th Annual Academy Awards. Yes, it was the most watched telecast of the week, averaging 32 million viewers -- the kind of crowd networks seldom see these days. And there's no denying the Oscarcast beat the combined CBS, NBC, Fox and CW on Sunday by nearly 3 million people. And yet . . . . (See Losers.)

"Fairly OddBaby." Stunningly, Nick's one-hour "Fairly OddParents" flick, in which little Timmy Turner's fairy godparents, Cosmo and Wanda, have a baby -- the first fairybaby to be born in thousands of years -- copped nearly 9 million viewers Monday, beating Fox's "Prison Break" season finale in the 8 p.m. time slot. Communications majors will write term papers about it. "OddBaby" also beat CBS and CW and squeaked past the first hour of ABC's "Dance War" season finale. "OddBaby" was, in fact, the week's most watched cable program, squashing CNN's Thursday coverage of the Democratic primary debate (7.6 million viewers and the second-most-watched primary debate in cable news history, by the way).

"Monk." USA's obsessive-compulsive detective drama wound up its sixth season Friday with its biggest audience yet, just under 7 million viewers, besting ABC, CBS and CW in the 9 p.m. hour.

"Bad Girls Club" attracted the biggest audience in Oxygen network's history, Tuesday at 10, 1.1 million viewers. This defines "damning with faint praise."

"Saturday Night Live." National stats won't be in for days but local-market figures indicate the first post-writers'-strike original episode clocked the NBC late-night series's biggest audience since February '06. Best rough guess: 7 million to 8 million viewers.

"American Idol." First two nights of singing for viewer votes beat the Academy Awards among 18-to-49-year-olds and nipped at Oscar's heels among viewers of all ages, with 29 million viewers both nights. Thursday's results show logged 23 million.

"Deal or No Deal." End of the NBC screaming-at-briefcases "Million Dollar Mission" stunt -- more $1 million briefcases to scream at (you had to be there) -- brought the show its biggest audience in almost a year, 17 million viewers.