Va. Colleges Reach Out to Silent Victims of Sexual Assault

But the pain remains the same

And I still remember

How you kept me so afraid.

And they make themselves available for quiet advice.

"I was focused on myself too much," Acker said. "It's allowed me to come through from that."

Koch said the idea for U-Va.'s support network came from a similar program for gay students.

The Survivor Support Network's target audience is men and women, gay or straight, who have been sexually assaulted, stalked or involved in an abusive relationship, and who might be uncomfortable seeking help at a venue such as the women's center.

"There is still such a pervasive culture of victim-blaming," Koch said, adding that efforts to find "teachable moments," such as well-meaning admonishments about irresponsible drinking, can distract from more important matters.

"Who cares what they were doing when they were raped?" she said. "That can be a conversation for later."

Claire Kaplan, director of Sexual and Domestic Violence Services at U-Va.'s Women's Center, said the program's goal is to make it easier for victims to be open.

"Students will actually be able to identify faculty that are knowledgeable and supportive, instead of guessing," she said.

Kirkland, who has headed the Sexual Assault Services office at GMU since the office's start in 1993, has tailored her efforts over time. After stalking complaints rose, her group wrote a new policy. They have been helping draft a campus statement on dating violence. Last month they started a blog, which can be found at http://gmusexualassaultservices.blogspot.com.

A core issue remains constant: Staying quiet can have a serious impact on victims of sexual assault, Kirkland said.

"They continue to blame themselves. A lot of students end up with depression. They start isolating themselves, staying in their room. Their friends drop them because they are no fun anymore," Kirkland said. "It's a vicious circle."