Oh, Behave: Taming Tips

Pauline Wallin identifies steps toward wrangling entitled behavior in "Taming Your Inner Brat: A Guide for Transforming Self-Defeating Behavior":

1. Picture your inner brat.

Assigning a visual to your unsavory traits allows you to view them with some perspective, make objective decisions and separate bad behavior from the real you.

2. Calm it down.

Entitled or bratty thoughts are not rational, so it's no use arguing with yourself. Telling yourself "Stop acting so stupid!" or "Quit being so childish!" only fuels negative emotion and the cycle of self-defeating behavior.

3. Listen to what your inner brat is implying. Bratty behavior operates on impulse, so the only way to effectively understand and undercut it is to pay attention and identify what it wants.

4. Take charge.

Minimize the conditions under which the inner brat is likely to thrive. If you feel entitled to buy something whenever you walk into a store, start leaving your credit cards at home and carry only the cash you intend to spend.

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These steps require focus and consistency, but one simple way to start quelling this behavior is to confront situations with "at least." As in, "I missed the highway exit, but at least I have a car and am not walking in the rain."

It also helps to take your attention away from yourself and how a situation affects only you. "If you're self-focused, you're not going to be happy even if you get your way," Wallin says. "You're just going to be looking for the next thing to be upset about."

-- Dan Zak