We Won't See More of David H., on 'Idol' Anyway

In the twin media capitals of New York and Los Angeles, tabloid editors are weeping buckets today -- former stripper David Hernandez has been given the hook on "American Idol."

Hernandez, the closest thing to scandal they'd been able to dredge up so far this season on the country's ratings gravy train, last night got the fewest of the 29 million votes cast for the 12 Idolette finalists.

Oh sure, we've been promised loads more scandal this season. Those Amanda Overmyer nudie photos? We're still waiting.

Danny Noriega's hating-Santa video -- pretty tame stuff. Ditto the photograph of Ramiele Malubay grabbing a girlfriend's "shoe."

The tragedy occurred during last night's "American Idol: Product Pandering/Results Show."

For this, the first of the product pandering shows, the producers pulled out all the stops.

The show opened with the animated characters from the classic children's story "Horton Hears a Who" sitting down to watch "Idol." The movie -- opening this week -- is from Fox.

Jim Carrey, who stars in the flick, is in the new "American Idol" studio, wearing bits of an elephant costume -- he plays the elephant in the movie. On "Idol" he plays the elephant in the room -- get it?

He and show host Ryan Seacrest yuk it up. Carrey insists he's a big fan of the Fox reality show and says all the Idolettes deserve "stars upon thars" with even less conviction than Fox sitcom star Brad Garrett, who used to stop by the show week after week last season because he was such a huge fan. Uh-huh.

It's time to name one of this week's Bottom Three. That's easy. Syesha Mercado. No word on what Jim Carrey thinks of this.

Time for the season's first Ford Commercial Masquerading as a Music Video. In the video, the Idolettes are all pretending to run for president, except of course they're all too young and two of them are foreign-born. But the important thing is, they're driving Fords.