Week 761: Strip Mining
Style Invitational Official Wonder Boy Bob Staake offers up these three comic strips for your consideration. While considering them, supply the text for any or all of the three. Please just type it up, with indications as to who's saying what; don't scribble it into the drawings. The Empress has enough problems reading your typing.
Winner gets the Inker, the official Style Invitational trophy. Second place gets a colorful, cute, slightly bent metal It's Happy Bunny sign with the legend "Sucky losers not allowed," purchased expressly for the Invitational by obviously-not-all-that-sucky (though arguably suck-uppy) Loser Russ Taylor of Vienna.
Other runners-up win their choice of a coveted Style Invitational Loser T-shirt or yearned-for Loser Mug. Honorable Mentions get one of the lusted-after Style Invitational Magnets. One prize per entrant per week. Send your entries by e-mail to firstname.lastname@example.org or by fax to 202-334-4312. Deadline is Monday, April 28. Put "Week 761" in the subject line of your e-mail, or it risks being ignored as spam. Include your name, postal address and phone number with your entry. Contests are judged on the basis of humor and originality. All entries become the property of The Washington Post. Entries may be edited for taste or content. Results will be published May 17. No purchase required for entry. Employees of The Washington Post, and their immediate relatives, are not eligible for prizes. Pseudonymous entries will be disqualified. The revised title for next week's results is by Tom Witte. This week's Honorable Mentions name is by Dave Prevar.
Report From Week 757
in which we sought Style Invitational-toned rhyming couplets featuring any of 13 letter pairs, a la Edward Gorey's famously horrific "Gashlycrumb Tinies" alphabet primer. The award for most off-the-wall response to a simple alphabet contest goes to Ben Aronin of Washington, who sent "I is for-Eigner, my English please pardon/J's for the jingoist hearts I see harden."
You'll notice what event was making the headlines when this contest was open; the former governor of New York gets a grateful thank-you from The Style Invitational.
A is for Ape, from whom man is descended.
B is for Bible-believers, offended. (Chris Doyle, Ponder, Tex.)
C's Callipygian, my favorite form.
D is for Droopy -- alas, that's the norm. (Tom Witte, Montgomery Village, third runner-up)
C is for Crotchety, a measure of age.
D is for Dead, a more certain gauge. (Dot Yufer, Newton, W.Va.)
E is for Enron, went freely astray.