Quack if You Love Manhattan

8:05 p.m. The museum is closed, but a small crowd -- most younger than I by more years than I care to think about -- is gathering inside near the magnificent white orb that houses the star show. I'm happy to see that after the Duck setback, this show will definitely go on.

It goes on. And on. "SonicVision" features a soundtrack of alternative music mixed by Moby and accompanied by computer animation on the Hayden's dome: dancing robots, psychedelic bubbles, roller-coaster vortexes. It's exhilarating, dizzying and, ultimately, tiring. I'm not the only one who feels this way; by the time Coldplay cranks up, there's a discernible hum of people talking to one another.

9:25 p.m. I head south on foot, but for this long haul, I stay out of the park. I talk to a couple walking a combination dachshund/floor mop, and consider stopping in to Tavern on the Green or the Plaza Hotel for a drink. Eh. I sort of look like a dachshund/floor mop myself at this point, so I grab some veggie lo mein from a noodle shop and call it a night.

10 a.m. Curses. The morning's first Duck tour is canceled because of fog. But there's hope: As a guy dressed like a duck bothers pedestrians, a company rep tells me to come back in an hour, when the weather is expected to clear.

11:54 a.m. At last, I'm sitting on the Duck. And it's moving. Every seat is full, and the skies are sunny.

(While I was waiting in line to get on, a guide stuck her head over the side and asked me if I was the dude who kept showing up for the canceled tours. Yep, that's me; must have been that big "L" across my forehead. Then she invited me to board first and told me where the best seat was. I'm not sharing.)

The roof-less "bus boat" -- which looks more like a Viking ship and is higher off the ground than Ducks I've taken in other cities -- winds down Broadway past Macy's and the Empire State Building, then plunges into the Hudson for a 20-minute cruise. Our guide, a former NYC cop, does a fine job pointing out that which must be pointed out, but I'll remember him most for the family stories he tells and the occasional cuss words that sneak out.

I'll also remember him for never once encouraging us to use our quackers. Then again, I'm the only person who bought one.

-- John Deiner