Round and Round the Critics Go. Where They'll Stop . . . Won't Be CBS or Fox

"The Simpsons." Huzzah to 20th Century Fox studio's animated comedy for snagging a 20th-season contract from Fox network. This puts "The Simpsons" in a tie with "Gunsmoke" as the longest-running series in the history of prime-time TV -- eat your heart out, Dick Wolf. And good for the show's voice artists for negotiating a salary of nearly $400,000 apiece per episode for next season's 20 episodes -- roughly, more money than you will ever see in your lifetime.

"In Plain Sight." Cable TV continues its love affair with drama series about damaged women who should no longer shop in the juniors section. Most recently, Mary McCormack as Witness Protection Program chick on "In Plain Sight" clocked 5.3 million viewers Sunday to make it USA network's most watched series premiere since the laugh-riot launch of "The 4400" in July '04.

LOSERS

2008 MTV Movie Awards. Did you know there are just under 3 million people willing to watch Mike Myers eat fake animal excrement in the name of groundbreaking humor? Didn't Divine originate that gag about 30 years ago? Sadly, that's the smallest audience for this once campy-fun trophy show in more than a decade. Last year it logged more than 3.6 million viewers; in '04 it approached 6 million; and at its peak in 2002, more than 7 million watched.

"Lost." File this under "In the land of the pygmies the guy who wears elevator shoes is king": The fourth-season finale of "Lost" was last week's most watched show (12.3 million viewers) and the biggest draw among the 18-49s who are the Hot Blond Chicks of Madison Avenue. Towering above its competition on Thursday, ABC notes, it topped Fox's "So You Think You Can Dance" by 2.7 million viewers and by 36 percent among the aforementioned HBCs. Last week, of course, was the first week of not-the-broadcast-TV-season. "Lost" also clocked its biggest audience in three whole months, ABC points out. That's right, three months! Even though it competed against the NBA Western Conference playoffs in much -- that's much-- of the country.

National Spelling Bee. Sadly, to make way for the out-of-season puff-uppery of "Lost," ABC moved this precious little franchise from Thursday to Friday night, where it suffered its smallest audience in three years. Fewer than 5 million watched, compared with last year's more than 7 million and the 8.5 million who watched it two years ago, when ABC knew how to treat it properly.

The week's 10 most watched programs, in order, were: ABC's "Lost"; CBS's "Two and a Half Men," "Million Dollar Password," "60 Minutes," "NCIS," "Criminal Minds" and "CSI: NY"; and Fox's Thursday "So You Think You Can Dance," "Hell's Kitchen" and Wednesday "So You Think You Can Dance."