Put a Caipirinha in Your Tank

The country's looking for independence from foreign oil. Lawmakers are listening to ethanol promoters tout the value of plant-based fuels -- corn or switch grass or sugar cane -- as an alternative.

The cane folks took out a full-page ad last week in the Capitol Hill newspaper Roll Call asking "Are we there yet?" and answering that "when it comes to energy independence, the answer is no."

The ad says, "It's time for renewable fuels like sugarcane ethanol -- that can reduce [oil and gasoline] prices."

Here's the problem, the ad says: "America is at a crossroads and faces a choice. We can continue our dependence on foreign oil or diversify and promote renewable biofuels like sugarcane ethanol." Readers are called on to "Help America Get There."

Maybe it should say "Help the Americas Get There." Seems the fine print at the bottom says the ad was "Paid for by Unica," which turns out to be an abbreviation for the Brazilian Sugarcane Industry Association. The other name at the bottom is Apex-Brasil, an agency that promotes trade with and investment in Brazil.

Ah, so that's why the ad also attacks a tariff on sugar cane "that drives up prices and keeps us dependent on foreign oil."

Well, yeah. It also keeps the corn producers from getting undercut by cheaper foreign imports from Brazil. That would be corn producers from the Midwest, from states such as Iowa and, yes, Illinois, home to a certain presidential candidate.

So we reduce "our dependence on foreign oil" and increase our dependence on foreign ethanol? Still, maybe there's an element of truthiness, as Stephen Colbert would say, in the pitch.

Tall and Tan and . . .

Speaking of Brazil, Department of Homeland Security chief Michael Chertoff's weekend trip to Brazil appears to be sparking grousing among DHS folks and others.

Brazil, a DHS spokesman noted, "is the preeminent economy in Latin America, with vast commercial shipping activity," and it's an ally in combating smuggling and human trafficking.

Maybe eyebrows were raised because he's staying at a luxury resort on famed Ipanema Beach, though we are assured that "the hotel is within the government rate." And word was there are helicopter rides planned, to see the famed Christ the Redeemer statue and other beaches and Rio de Janeiro landmarks.

Another curiosity is that, even though the idea is to check on shipyard security and such, the trip isn't to Santos, about four hours south. Santos, according to the American Association of Port Authorities, is the largest container port in Latin America, handling about 661/27 times the volume of Rio, which is listed as No. 18.