D-Day 2009 Commences On Their Signal

On the day of doom, those households will "just pick up the low-power TV stations in the area," Sedmak says. Think public access (PTA meetings in Vietnamese) -- no NBC, ABC, CBS.

So, a recap: On Feb. 17, 12 to 15 percent of Americans who may or may not want to watch television will find themselves briefly able to receive only cruddy stations, until or unless they go to Best Buy and purchase a converter box, which the government will subsidize.

You will have to plug it in yourself, though there are videos online helping you do that, too.

We are in for some hard times.

This is why RadioShack.com announces ominously, in block letters, "A change in TV broadcasting is coming. Will you be ready?"

Why videos on YouTube, posted by DTVanswers (an initiative by the National Association of Broadcasters), warn that consumers who don't step up "will risk losing TV altogether." A confused woman in the ad sits in a dimly lit room, her television having simply . . . stopped.

We expect Sam Waterston to appear at any moment, hawking DTV robot insurance in an alarmist infomercial.

FYI: The United States is not alone in this endeavor. We have been preceded in the digital transition by eight European countries, including Estonia, Andorra and Luxembourg, none of which imploded upon completion of the switch. Thirty-one other countries are currently mid-transition, including the United Kingdom, which also has an informational site with FAQs. The United Kingdom's FAQs total just 3 1/2 pages.

But Americans really love TV.

God, but we love it. Even our broadcast channels, vintage and Podunk as they seem next to Showtime and CNN.

Those who can't watch "Mad Men" on AMC can take solace in "Lost," or "Ellen," or a new "Law & Order" every single week (after 18 years!) -- free.

The family bonding and social lubricant benefits of television are hard to overstate, though many TV proponents have tried. The public safety aspect, too, which is what the FCC stresses: How else will people be informed?