Preparing for Reunion Provides Lessons in Moving On

When Amy Bocook Kilpatrick sat down to write a letter to persuade her classmates from W.T. Woodson High to join her for the 25th reunion, she chose a risky strategy: She decided to tell the truth. Not for her the cheery boilerplate that characterizes most reunion "greeters."

"Okay, so, let's be honest here," she began. "How many of us have had one of those 'mid-life crisis' episodes already?"

Amy knew of at least one Woodson alum who had: Her. Not long after her class's 20th reunion, the life she'd built for herself -- elementary school teacher in Fairfax and Spotsylvania counties, wife, mother -- started to unravel. A former student died of a heart ailment over the summer. Then a boy in her class lost his battle with leukemia. After the Virginia Tech shootings -- she and her husband had attended the school and one of his professors was among those killed -- Amy snapped.

"I was in a dark place," she says now, describing her depression. "It was tough for my whole family. But I got the help I needed, and I'm good."

Counseling, antidepressants, her faith, her family, her friends, the simple act of laughing -- all these things helped Amy lift herself out of the hole she was in. So, too, did the book "The Last Lecture" by a Carnegie Mellon computer science professor named Randy Pausch. Stricken with terminal cancer, Pausch delivered an acclaimed lecture to a packed auditorium on achieving your childhood dreams.

Slowly, Amy recovered. She left her teaching job, went to library school and now is a school librarian in Virginia's King George County. She's looking forward to the October reunion she's helping to plan, to reconnecting with old friends or connecting for the first time with classmates she might not have known well 25 years ago. And she's been gratified by the response her letter received.

"It really helped me to see how many people are nonjudgmental and how many people do go through stuff," said Amy, 42. "Maybe I made somebody feel a little more like it's okay. It's okay to fall apart a little bit. Keep trudging, and it'll be all right."

That may not be something they teach you in high school, but it's never too late to learn.

Celebrate Good Times

These area high school classes are reuniting in coming months. If yours is, send details to kellyj@washpost.com.

Northwestern Class of 1968 -- Friday-Sunday. Contact Regenia Willmann Campbell at bobnregi@verizon.net, 301-422-3665 or 301-219-3529. http://hometown.aol.com/nwreunion1968 .