Palin Hits The Motherload

This is part of the never-ending conversation among mothers, working and stay-at-home, full-time and flex. Is there a mother around who heard Palin's story and didn't reflect on her own choices?

I don't question whether Palin can pull off the most impressive juggling act in the history of working moms, balancing, as she told People magazine, BlackBerry and breast pump. But I do wonder -- somewhat to my astonishment -- why she'd choose to, and I suspect many mothers feel the same.

Looking over my female friends -- educated and accomplished -- it is hard to think of one who has not trimmed her career sails to accommodate family life. Amazingly, I know more women who have opted out than who work full-steam ahead.

This is not what I expected. Fourteen years ago, pregnant with my first child, I listened to two female friends, then high-powered Capitol Hill lawyers, discuss their dream part-time schedules.

"Not me, ladies," I thought, smugly certain. Eight months later, maternity leave up, I was in my editor's office, announcing that I wanted to scale back to four days a week. In a few years, I was down to three -- and my friends had left their Hill jobs. Now I work full time, but not without ample agonizing and only because of a flexible boss.

My husband is a terrific dad, but the stark truth is that he does not feel the same homeward tug. He did a great job managing during the conventions, except for the unfortunate incident with the wrong doctor form for school, but when Julia needed to make lemon squares right away, I gave long-distance instruction from St. Paul -- on deadline, naturally.

I would not, in truth, have it any other way. Wondering about Palin's choice does not make me less of a feminist -- just a realistic one. When I got home, I took the day off to clean the kids' closets and get some meals in the freezer. Like Sarah Palin ditching the executive chef, I felt much better.

marcusr@washpost.com