Inaugural Ideas: Second Thoughts for Third Parties

You'll never guess who really, really wants to go to the inauguration: Ralph Nader.

The sometimes cantankerous outsider has sent an open letter to Barack Obama asking that third-party candidates -- the Libertarian Party's Bob Barr, the Constitution Party's Chuck Baldwin and the Green Party's Cynthia McKinney -- be included among the Democrats, Republicans, business execs and others at the January ceremonies.

"I have not spoken to any of them about this recommendation," Nader writes. "To avoid any semblance of self-interest, I will delete my name from this list and watch the event on C-SPAN."

Oh, c'mon -- the man's dying for an invite.

Nader called us to elaborate: "In other Western European countries, it's a political courtesy to have their competitors. It's a demonstration of unity." Er, competitors? Obama and John McCain got 123 million votes combined; other presidential candidates received a total of 1.5 million votes nationwide, with Nader in the lead at 685,000.

Nader assumes that both McCain and Sarah Palin will have some role in the inaugural weekend and, frankly, seems to want some of the same respect. The swearing-in? "That's the best and most visible," he said. "I don't expect to be invited to an inaugural ball."

If the president-elect does cough up a ticket, will Nader behave? "I don't have to be asked to be respectful," he chided us.

Dogged Flackery

The intense public interest in the future Obama dog has been an inspiration to PR folks across our puppy-crazed nation. The American Kennel Club got into the act early with a national poll this summer to identify the favorite sneeze-free breed (Malia is allergic). Other marketers jumping up to lick our faces lately:

· Milk-Bone, promising a "a LIFETIME supply" of dog biscuits to the new first pup.

· The new Twentieth Century Fox comedy "Marley and Me," which brought its shelter-dog star to the Ellipse on Wednesday for a Humane Association event promoting doggy adoptions.

· The D.C. Ritz-Carlton, hosting yet another poll asking its fancy clientele to pick a breed (for every ballot, it'll give $1 to the Washington Humane Society) and a possible name for the first canine.

· The Friends of the Peruvian Hairless Dog Association, offering a free 4-month-old Peruvian hairless (said to be nonallergenic) to the Obama family.

· Anti-puppy-mill activist Jana Kohl, flacking a new book about her three-legged pup Baby -- which just happens to have a photo of the president-elect holding her hero.

Continental Flare-Up: Carla vs. Italy

French first lady Carla Bruni-Sarkozy and Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi are feuding over his crack that Barack Obama is "young, handsome and tanned."

Bruni-Sarkozy told Journal du Dimanche: "When I heard Silvio Berlusconi's joke describing Barack Obama as 'tanned' . . . I'm very happy that I became French!" Berlusconi's camp quickly smacked back: "We too are indeed happy that she is no longer Italian," Francesco Cossiga, Italy's former president, told Corriere della Sera. "I would go as far to say that we are very happy!" Then Cossiga got personal: "But who knows? In her tumultuous life, Carla Bruni may one day end up having to ask for her Italian citizenship back."

Spouses aren't attending tonight's "working" dinner for world leaders at the White House, but we assume that Berlusconi and French President Nicolas Sarkozy will be seated at different tables.

Quoted

"I've had a hair transplant . . . because I have got a very strange shaped head. It's very pointy. And I don't like wearing wigs."

-- John Cleese baring all in a British television interview, reports the Telegraph, which went on to snark that "the difference appears to be limited as he is still mostly bald."