For Gays in India, Fear Rules

Ponni Arasu, left, Arvind Narrain, center, and Siddharth Narrain are activists with the Alternative Law Forum in Bangalore, which is working to repeal the 1860 law. (By Emily Wax -- The Washington Post)
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In reality, gay and lesbian Indians say, they have few places to meet openly, and studies show that they often lead dangerous, closeted lives, with high rates of suicide and mental illness. Lesbians have reported being fired from their jobs and raped for not being feminine enough. Most gay Indians are married, often with children, and have covert relationships with lovers, activists said.

That's part of the reason blackmail has become a thriving mini-industry here, illustrating just how powerful the law is in daily life.

"In India, blackmail is the perfect crime," said Vikram Doctor, a gay activist and writer. "It's possible because there are so many closeted victims in India, where being gay is a crime. They can't fight back or follow through on a complaint. There's little refuge in the law unless it is amended."

Even in cosmopolitan cities such as Bangalore, the gay community is seen as a secret club where a special pass is needed to attend gay nights at an underground bar.

Throughout India's history, homosexuality has been largely taboo. Nonetheless, the transgender community enjoyed some social acceptance in the cultural traditions of Hinduism and Islam in India, and some tribal groups see lesbians as having mystical powers. But European missionaries and British rule further demonized homosexuality, and the country's pulpits are to this day bastions of anti-gay rhetoric.

India remains a largely conservative nation. Not only is marriage a societal duty, it also drives economic activity, activists said. As India's middle and upper classes expand, so do the enormous dowries given to grooms and their parents by brides' families. The dowries, though technically illegal, almost always include a car for the new couple, along with an apartment and often large amounts of wedding gold.

"Being gay is hard all over the world. But try it in India, where being blackmailed is every boy's fear," said Khaleel Syed, 21, a somber-looking computer technician in Bangalore who is open about his sexuality with his friends but not with his family. "I'm taking a risk. Because in India there is just unbelievable pressure to get married. Those working in blackmail know this. So we can never really be ourselves, be free."

Blackmail rackets have taken hold recently in India's cities, largely because of the Internet, Doctor said. Blackmailers cruise chat rooms, flirt and set up dates. They then extort money from their victims.

Bhavna Paliwal, a "wedding detective" who is hired to ferret out the truth about prospective mates, said she often discovers grooms who are gay and being blackmailed.

"Their lives are so stressful," she said, adding that many cry when they are caught and beg not to be exposed. "Being gay is one of the most well-guarded and shockingly common secrets in marriages. The blackmailers can rob them blind."

Gay Bombay, a support group in Mumbai, recently posted a warning on its Web site about a gang of criminals targeting young gay men.

This summer, Mumbai police even apprehended one of their own, Sub-inspector Ashok Temkar, who was arrested along with four associates for repeatedly extorting money from gay men.

The gay men would meet Temkar on a social networking Web site and arrange a face-to-face date. Then several men dressed in police uniforms would demand money and take the men's cellphones and wallets, saying that being gay was illegal. The extortionists were caught because they were doing this so frequently, amassing hundreds of thousands of dollars in cash, phones and jewelry.

"It was Thursday night, June 4. I found a gay room in yahoo messenger. I started looking. I was invited by a guy of 21 years old," a young man wrote in an online warning on Gay Bombay's Web site. "When we reached, there were three guys not one. They demanded we go to a police station. They wanted 10,000 rupees. I had 3,000. He said he would call my wife. I said I would have to get a loan from my work. In fact, I had to seek that. Please everyone beware that this blackmail is spreading through our community."

Many young gay activists say the time is right to challenge the prejudices that feed blackmail and start a wider discussion here on what being gay really means.

"Gay rights is growing by leaps and bounds in India," said Ponni Arasu, 24, a lesbian who is working to change the law. "But if this is the new India, we should leave the old law behind. It's too dangerous a law to live with."