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Week 793: Take the Fifth
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The China Doctrine: The squeaky wheel gets the boiling oil. (Chris Rollins)
The O.J. Simpson Doctrine: If at first you don't succeed in getting convicted, try, try again. (Mike Ostapiej, Tracy, Calif.; Karen C. Love, Morehead City, N.C., a First Offender)
The Donald Trump Doctrine: Never let them see you sweet. (Mike Ostapiej)
The Carville Doctrine: The only good Republican is a bedded Republican. (David Garratt, Glenn Dale)
The Wolf Blitzer Doctrine: Coming up, my doctrine for repeating the obvious! Stick around, I think you'll wanta hear this! (Leo Agan, Annapolis, a First Offender)
The Elisabeth Hasselbeck Doctrine: If you're not the lead dog, The View never changes. (Marty McCullen, Gettysburg, Pa.)
The Dylan Doctrine: Don't ever mnfffw your grgnwnmls. (Roy Ashley, Washington)
The Pit Bull Doctrine: I may look funny with lipstick, but you'll look funnier without an arm. (Lawrence McGuire)
The Zorro Doctrine: It's not vandalism, it's free speech. (Lawrence McGuire)
The Lieberman Doctrine: Carefully determine the winning candidate in any election, and then back the other guy. (Andrew Hoenig, Rockville)
The Iceland Doctrine: Go for broke. (Bob Reichenbach, Philadelphia)
The Amy Winehouse Doctrine: A friend with weed is a friend indeed. (Mike Ostapiej)
The Golden Retriever Doctrine: Is that a ball? Is that a ball? Is that a ball? Is that a ball? (Beth Morgan)
The Empress Doctrine: Droll, baby, droll! (Phil Frankenfeld)
The Empress Doctrine: Always bury the filthy jokes at the end. (Stephen Dudzik, Olney)
Next Week: If Only! or History Repeals Itself
