In Vegas, It's Easy to Live XXL

LAS VEGAS

With the economy at a crossroads, a cross-section of America still converges here every summer. It's as if money grows on palm trees in the middle of The Strip, because, even with recessionary dollars harder to come by, bigger crowds keep coming to the World Series of Poker.

In good times or bad, the one constant is: Gamblers will gamble.

Each year I watch with wonder -- as ESPN's alleged poker expert -- at the Brobdingnagian bankrolls that roll into town.

Then again, Las Vegas is an around-the-clock Mecca to excess.

(It's sort of like ESPN, without "SportsCenter.")

And in a city that invites and defines excess, there are excessive displays of conspicuous consumption everywhere. The other night, when I couldn't sleep -- who sleeps here? -- I compiled a list of my favorite immoderate, larger-than-large Las Vegas landmarks:

World's Largest Burrito: How big? Two feet in length, six pounds in weight -- or about the same size as Yao Ming at birth. It's available at the NASCAR Cafe at the Sahara Hotel & Casino and it costs $19.95.

But there's a customer-friendly catch.

These are the words straight from the menu board: "Finish It and It's Free!"

Now, before you call Southwest and get on the next no-hidden-fees flight, ask yourself this: Could you eat 24 Quarter Pounders with cheese at McDonald's? Exactly. Still, I wanted to conquer that 96-ounce burrito, but, well, I can't expense these things anymore -- what with newspapers plunging into bankruptcy -- and I thought a double sawbuck was too much to pay for apocalyptic indigestion.

On the other hand, if I'm the Oakland Raiders, I'd shift my practice facility to Sin City tomorrow and the entire team could eat without cost every day.