Bowling: A sport that's quite striking

Yet another Professional Bowlers Association season is upon us -- I know, I know, where does the time go? -- and it is stuffed with more story lines than Don Draper's secret lives. Here are three that keep me dreaming of converting 7-10 splits:

-- There is a left-hander, the irrepressible Rhino Page, who remains my Bowler of Destiny.

-- There is a right-hander, the incomparable Walter Ray Williams Jr., who remains the best bowler of our time.

-- And there is a two-hander, the inconceivable Jason Belmonte, who, yes, delivers the ball two-handed.

(I am writing about bowling because we are a nation of bowlers. Heck, we were bowling before we were a nation -- Columbus, three days prior to discovering America, stopped in at a West Indies alley and rolled a 601 series; he also beat two of his crewmates in air hockey and got some chili fries at the grill.)

Rhino Page is molded in my image -- a southpaw, with large dreams and large ears. In a certain light at a certain time of day, we're both good-looking guys. (My apologies to Rhino for using artistic license and lumping him in with me.) Both of us are better at what we do than most people realize.

In 2007-08, Page was the PBA's rookie of the year. After winning one title then, he followed it up in 2008-09, as the Bowler of Destiny, with another title. But he broke my heart -- shattered it in 39 pieces from my beanbag chair to my water bed -- at the Tournament of Champions.

Trying to win his first major, Page dug out of a 31-pin hole against Patrick Allen with eight straight strikes; it was more scintillating than watching Michael Phelps swim for eight gold medals. He needed a strike-9-spare in the 10th frame to win. He got the strike, then threw the worst shot of his career -- I swear, the ball would not have hit the Bering Sea if he dropped it out of a Bering Sea fishing boat -- leaving six pins standing and Couch Slouch slumping.

(Distraught and depressed, I could not work for two weeks, prompting my 10-year-old stepdaughter Mia to comment, "When you are working, what is it you do?")

Rhino and I have come to terms, and he has promised me a major title this season.

Walter Ray Williams Jr. owes me nothing -- we owe him everything for an unmatched career. He is a six-time PBA player of the year and a six-time world horseshoe pitching champion, making him the most dominant two-sport athlete in U.S. history.

(Yeah, I know, it's bowling and horseshoes. I don't care if it were marbles and Twister. Nobody's saying he climbed Mount Everest with one hand tied behind his back, we're just saying he is a remarkable performer in two athletic pursuits.)