Week 843: Prefrains

Hey, who left these golf clubs over here?

Whose woods these are I think I know . . .

Here's a (possibly) new contest for the Invite, suggested by Hall of Fame Loser Kevin Dopart, whose name, according to the Losers' own official statistics, happens to anagram to "Deviant Pork": Provide a sentence or two of lead-in to the first line of a well-known book, poem or (don't worry, you can play, too) song, as in the example above. We're going to be somewhat flexible on what constitutes the first line of a song; if there's an introductory verse that nobody sings, for example, we might be willing to ignore it.

Winner gets the Inker, the official Style Invitational trophy. Second place receives -- just in time for the canapes at your most formal holiday party -- the Voodoo Doll Toothpick Holder pictured here, thanks to 1,382-time Loser (is that redundant or what?) Russell Beland and his son Adam, who has five blots of ink himself.

This just in: One of last week's First Offenders has decided that we should no longer call him Alexander Ring. He wants us to call him Ring Alexander. We will (since the latter is his name), but only if he calls us Empress The.

Other runners-up win their choice of a coveted Style Invitational Loser T-shirt or yearned-for Loser Mug. Honorable Mentions get one of the lusted-after Style Invitational Magnets. One prize per entrant per week. Send your entries by e-mail to losers@washpost.com or by fax to 202-334-4312. Deadline is Monday, Nov. 23. Put "Week 843" in the subject line of your e-mail, or it risks being ignored as spam. Include your name, postal address and phone number with your entry. Contests are judged on the basis of humor and originality. All entries become the property of The Washington Post. Entries may be edited for taste or content. Results will be published Dec. 12. No purchase required for entry. Employees of The Washington Post, and their immediate relatives, are not eligible for prizes. Pseudonymous entries will be disqualified. The revised title for next week's results is by Dave Prevar; this week's honorable-mentions name is by Tom Witte. For his contest idea, Kevin wins a can of Pu-Erh organic tea, donated by Les Greenblatt.

Report from Week 839

In which we asked you to make up "portmanteau words," or a word in which two existing words overlap by two or more letters. The words had to start with A, B, C or D. Frequently submitted: Abracadabrassiere: The Wonderbra. And many, many variations on "balloony" to describe the Heene family.

The winner of the Inker

Buttheadbutt: A Limbaugh-Olbermann shouting match. (Patricia Casey, McLean)

2. the winner of the super-secret CIA, NSA and DIA coffee mugs: Disasterisk: A footnote in Metro's annual report. (Elise Jacobs, Silver Spring)

3.Algebrassiere: 36A + 10K = 36D. (Ellen Raphaeli, Falls Church)

4.Anecdoddering: Losing your place halfway through a story 'bout the good old days. (Craig Dykstra, Centreville)

Portmanteauverflow: Honorable Mentions

Crapplause: A polite but unenthusiastic expression of approval. (Dion E. Black, Washington, a First Offender)