Ask Amy: Wife feels threatened by bachelor party

DEAR AMY: My husband is a groomsman in his best friend's wedding.

He was invited for a three-day bachelor party in another state and really wanted to go.

I told him it was irresponsible for a married man with a child to party for three days and spend the kind of money that would have been involved. I suggested he do something with his friend locally to celebrate (i.e. enjoy a nice dinner or a round of golf).

He decided not to go because he didn't want to upset me.

It turned out that a bunch of the local guys who were invited couldn't go, and so now they are planning a large bachelor party here.

Being closer only changes some of the financial concerns, not my emotional concerns.

I feel that it is wrong for a married man to attend a bachelor party.

He says I should trust him and that he would leave if they went somewhere inappropriate.

The whole idea of a bachelor party makes my stomach churn.

My husband and his friends spent some time at a restaurant for his bachelor party.

Am I being a prude to not want my husband to go? -- Old-Fashioned in Virginia

Dear Old-Fashioned: You should stop acting like your husband's mommy and start acting like a grown-up who is secure enough to trust her husband to make good choices.